the real deal

It seems I am glorifying the stay-at-home mom scenario. When a single friend pontificates getting "knocked up" to live the stay-at-home mom life that "would be a dream come true" I realize I must present the real deal. Immediately.

First, let Cheris tell it how it is. She is more eloquent than I.

Second, let me say that I spend MOST of my day cleaning up someone else's crap. Literally.

I value being at home with Drew, but I have said since his birth that this is the hardest job I've ever had...and I'm not joking. I even worked as a "park aide" at the most popular RI beach cleaning bathrooms. That was a breeze. The reality is a baby doesn't understand when you're having a "bad day" or that you tore a tendon in your wrist and would be so grateful if he stopped twisting himself while you try to wipe his bootie. He doesn't get it that if he continues to close the drawer on his finger it will hurt, or that sneaking outside onto the deck without Mommy is dangerous. He can't empathise when, despite an entire pot of coffee, you are so tired from waking at 5am after having been up several time to soothe his tears. He doesn't care that he peed through his diaper, pjs, sheet, and mattress pad AGAIN. He giggles when you say "no" as he dares to walk along the edge of the fireplace or deliberately throws food on the floor as a "game." While the teacher in me loves trying to develop new learning activities to stimulate his growing mind and body...and the social me enjoys meeting new moms (did I mention I had NO mommy friends when Drew was born?!?) ...it is still work. After cleaning all day and caring for Drew I am literally dead when Daddy comes home (and yes, I often sit in the yard or at the door eagerly awaiting his arrival!!). Chris jokes that I have "returned to my spot on the couch" as soon as he enters, but he must appreciate that I'm at least awake. It's physically, emotionally, and mentally draining...but the joy of watching my little boy grow makes it all worthwhile. And I realize working moms often envy the stay-at-home mom, but trust me...we envy the working mom too. And as for you non-moms...you have no idea how we live vicariously through your every experience. Each time you dine out (bastards!) or sleep in (damn you!) or enjoy martinis with friends (lucky you!) or go to the cinema (curse you!) or plan a vacation (wha?!?) ...think of us. Cleaning poop, pushing strollers, longing for more sleep, exhausted, ready to repeat today tomorrow.

Trust me. You don't want to get knocked up.