¡Qué interesante!

So Thankful...

2011-11-30T13:41:00.003-05:00

These three little people bring me so much joy; and for them, I am so thankful. I like to keep it real and I'm not ashamed to say this parenting gig is HARD WORK and at times, simply overwhelming. And while I may lose my cool or miss my ME time, I am filled with so much love and joy when I think about, hold, spend time with...these three. They are clever, creative, silly, affectionate, thoughtful, and loads of fun!

At this time of year, more than any other, "we" are reflective about what is good in our lives, how we can show kindness & appreciation, and what it means to give. This holiday I'd like to give the kids a little bit more of ME. A little less frustrated mommy, a little less tired mommy, a little less busy-at-the-computer mommy. A little more on-the-floor-playing mommy, a little more organized, patient, punctual, prepared, and calm mommy. I think that is the best gift I can give.

It's not easy being a parent. It's not easy being a young kid either. Life is filled with challenges...it's about how we meet (and overcome) those challenges. We need to make the good moments GREAT and put the stresses away while we play. They won't be young forever; and I know I'll miss this chaotic time of life. I love them and appreciate the joy they bring me every day. I love that they embrace me as their mom - for better or worse - and appreciate that they let me sing and dance and laugh and hike and play and color and snuggle....with them.

I'm so thankful for my beautiful children, my amazing partner, and all the blessings I've received.

xoxo

Letting go...

2011-09-04T15:19:00.003-04:00

I've never been good at letting go...of anything! I like change; I love adventure; I hate endings and goodbyes. I've spent much of this year preparing myself that at some point Melia would move into her own room...and breastfeeding would come to an end. I expected it would happen sometime this summer so I had ample time to emotionally prepare myself for this big change. On nights when Melia woke multiple times, or mornings when she was awake before 6am, I'd feel really ready for this change. I bought the new queen bed linens, a cute lamp, valences, a big decal for her wall (a beautiful tree)...Chris and I picked out paint colors and I begged him to start painting. It took many nights of hard work (he painted the trim, the walls, the doors!) and the room was finally complete. On September 1st, Melia, 20 months of age, moved into her beautiful big girl room ~ just next door to me.

She did great! We spent a good amount of time playing and reading books in there in the days leading up to the big move. She was happy in her bright new room. And when it was time to turn off the lights, she said, "night night" as she's done every night for quite some time.

I didn't expect it to be that easy. For her.

I cried. I wept for the baby who was no longer a baby. I thought of how I'd always been RIGHT THERE to meet her every need; and how awesome that has felt. I was overcome with love for this little girl...who is turning into a confident, independent, strong person. I felt a bit sad that she didn't need me anymore. Of course she needs me, but not the way she's needed me for months gone by. Things are different now.

I am happy that this has not been stressful for her. She seems to really like her new space. She's been less emotional about this transition than me, but that's ok. And, along with a new room, I think the end of our nursing relationship is eminent. I've decided I won't offer, but wait for her to ask. Last night, she was ready for bed after we snuggled and read several books...and I held her tight and said good night. I can't keep offering because I want it to continue. I need to follow her lead. She is ready. I must be too.

I disagree when people say "it's about time." It was never about time at all. It was about a mom and her little girl feeling ready for a big change. We were ready in our own time.

And now, I've been sleeping a bit deeper and a bit longer...enjoying some quiet time in my room before slumber (with lights on!). I will admit, I'm running into her room pretty quickly when she wakes up (which today was 8am!!); and it brings me great joy to see her big smile. I never imagined loving with this kind of intensity. She amazes me and fills my heart.

My big girl.

xoxo

Little Boys Rock BUT...

2011-07-10T13:52:00.004-04:00

Sometimes it's nice to just be with a little girl...or two...or six! Today I hosted a Tea & Cakes party for Melia and a few friends (all with one year old girls...no older siblings and no boys!). It was such fun!

We often talk about how important it is for each child to get parent-alone time...and it's equally important, in my opinion, that they get peer-alone time. I noticed it was an adjustment for Melia to be among 1 yr. old babes. She is typically with older kids (mostly boys) and she gets away with a LOT. Today she had to take turns and share everything...without being indulged for simply being the "baby."

It's also incredibly nice to have JUST ONE CHILD when I'm used to being with three! I felt spoiled by the ease of the whole morning.

And this weekend I had the pleasure of dining out with JUST DEAN, the middle child, who is now 4 yrs old. Yesterday, Daddy took JUST DREW to the beach where they enjoyed swimming, surfing, and hanging out...sans siblings. So, everyone got their turn this weekend :) We try to be fair; we try to be in tune with what each child needs and when they need it. It's a lot of work...and it means my hubby and I spent a few hours apart on both Saturday and Sunday ~ which is typically our time to enjoy each other as well as the kids. BUT, it was worth it. Worth it to make each child feel important. And we all hung out together last night at a friend's house; and hubby & I spent quality time together after they went to bed. I'd say it was a win-win-win-win-win...all around!

June 23, 2011

2011-06-23T13:15:00.005-04:00

Today is DEAN'S FOURTH BIRTHDAY!

I remember clearly the hot summer day when Dean was born. I wrote about it here and honestly remember it as clearly now as I did when writing! Dean is an amazing little guy: loving, silly, creative, shy, artistic, funny, smart, thoughtful, playful, ... and super cute :)

Today is also the day Drew will graduate from Kindergarten

I can't believe his first year of elementary school is finished (well, almost). This year has been SO transformative. Drew has learned to READ, WRITE, do MATH, keep a journal,...he's learned about planets, space, our environment & state, how trees become wood, how to be a good friend, dinosaurs and mammals, 3-dimensional art... His kindergarten teacher, Mrs. B, was loving, kind, science-oriented, fun, free-spirited, and perfect for Drew! I can NOT believe he'll be in first grade in September.

And today Melia pooped in the potty without my soliciting it!

Ok, I am missing the perfect potty shot here...but had to include a picture ;) Melia has peed and pooped on the potty before, but today she said "poo poo" and went over to the potty and sat down. So cool! I would be beyond excited if she potty trained this summer!!

These things I know to be true...

2011-06-18T22:53:00.004-04:00

I have my own words of wisdom ~ led by my own experiences ~ which I share often. These are the things I know to be true. This is for the mamas...

We are more alike than we are different

Whether you are breast or bottle feeding, co-sleeping or far away from your baby...you are doing the best you can do for your family. We can have different experiences, different perceptions, different values, but we all love our babies.

Anything goes in the first few months

Don't sweat it if you're taking naps with your baby, letting him sleep on your chest - or in the swing, carseat, stroller. Don't worry if you nurse, rock, hold, bounce your baby to sleep. Forgive yourself for creating any bad habits. Whatever you need to do so you all get some rest, do!

BAD HABITS CAN BE BROKEN

If it isn't a problem for YOU, then it's not a problem

People always want to know if they should sleep train their child who's waking once or twice a night to feed. Sometimes they are completely exhausted and frustrated...and I share information with them regarding sleep training. Other times they are totally fine with it, but worry everyone thinks something is wrong. If you don't mind, who cares what other people think! And it reminds me,

If someone asks you if your baby is sleeping through the night,

SAY YES!

This too shall pass

I may never forget the days of colic, or the anxiety of bedtime, or the drama among kids, and that's fine. What I do know is that it will end. It's will be a part of the past someday. And we'll have new challenges. Something really difficult - or frustrating - today, will not be an issue tomorrow. We just need to make it through THIS moment. Stages and phases...it's all stages and phases. And no,

The grass is not greener on the other side

Once you go there, you can't go back

This is how I think of food: Start with plain yogurt - because after you eat the vanilla you'll never want the plain. Or, don't give the kids artificial sweeteners because the real fruit tastes so sweet! And it makes sense in other ways: Once you use food or reward incentives - or, on the contrary, punishments - to movitate behaviors, you may find yourself in a rut. So, start simple. Simple foods. Simple routines. Simple structures. Simple behaviors.

Cherish the relationship with your partner

It's hard to make time for relationships when you've been giving so much to a child/children all day. However, in 18 years the children will be moving forward with their own lives; and wouldn't it be nice to have your partner, your best friend by your side? Aren't you both worth it?
Relationships take work

Work at it

Spring

2011-05-15T21:10:00.011-04:00

SPRING FUN! We've been having a great time outdoors...enjoying the warmer weather!

We went to our friend Harlyn's house where we held chicks, saw 200 bees, fed worms to the hen and roosters, picked flowers, was gifted chives to plant, and had lots of fun!!

Diamond Hill State Park

Cumberland, RI

Feeding the animals at Healey's Farm

(which, by the way, is just beyond our woods...in our own backyard!)

Good Grief!

2011-05-15T09:34:00.002-04:00

Dear Grief,

You take me by surprise...as though I'm completely unaware that you're following me...and turn my day upside down. You remind me of what I've lost. You bring floods of emotion which pour through my eyes and stream down my face. You show me life ~ the cycle of life ~ and remind me of what else I might loose one day. Yet somehow, swirling around the despair, you bring me strength. You invite me to remember the good times, the words of encouragement and praise, the unconditional love, the deep connection. You encourage me to move forward. You shout, "LOVE! LOVE YOUR CHILDREN, YOUR HUSBAND, YOUR MOTHER..." because we know how quickly time passes and that nothing is forever. You throw me from my comfortable place into a world both scary and true: the present. Live in the present. Maybe, dear grief, you bring a gift with you. A gift which reminds us of how precious each one is, how fleeting the moment shall be, and that we must appreciate it now.

And with that, I bid farewell. I am off to PLAY!

~kristen

Spring

2011-04-29T14:17:00.002-04:00

Although I have been floating in a sea of sadness since the loss of my grandmother, there are still moments of joy in each day. One of the greatest joys is my own Melia Joy, who is a happy, playful toddler! She has become quite a big girl and loves being outside, climbing & running, playing alongside her brothers, and having fun! The weather, too, has brough some happiness our way. We are hiking, walking on the bike path, playing at playgrounds, eating at picnic tables, and enjoying fresh air!

Melia cracks me up too! About a week ago we went for a hike - which lasted about 1.5 hours - of which Melia walked ONE HOUR! I wore my Ergo the whole time, assuming she wouldn't last long walking, but my high energy girl kept on going (just holding my hand...to avoid stumbling on tree roots). When we finally got back to the car, and she was set down from the carrier, she ran back into the woods! She, of all three children, is usually the one to complain (cry) when we leave a playground, when it's time to come inside for dinner, or when it's raining and we just can't play outside. Actually, every morning when we drop off Dean, Melia points to his school playground and begs to go play! I assure her we will play after we pick up Dean, but this doesn't comfort her much. She wants to play: always! It's kind of an endearing quality. I love her high energy, desire to be outside playing, and her adventurous spirit!

At the age of 5 1/2, Drew has become much more affectionate and loving. He's been more cuddly lately; and I love it! Dean is still too busy for me to hold him long, but I'm confident he'll come around with age too :) Drew is also READING - seriously reading. He's way beyond sounding out 3-letter words and constantly impresses me. This morning he was reading the milk container: StonyField - Big word! He also writes, adds, talks about dinosaur characteristics/habitats/outerspace with confidence in his knowledge. He amazes me.

Dean is emerging from his shell. It took him 2 weeks to utter a sound at preschool this Fall, and this week his teacher said she now has to ask him to be quiet and give other students a turn in morning circle. Apparently, like his big brother, he likes to set the facts straight ~ especially during the calendar/weather talk. I can see him now: No! It's not cloudy outside, it's sunny! See! (pointing to the window) I have two little know it alls (soon to be three), but their confidence is not a bad thing.

So, while the kids may cause chaos on a daily basis, they are also the HIGHLIGHT of my every day...and life.

in this moment

2011-04-24T13:13:00.006-04:00

in this moment
where wind chimes sing
soft breezes
the wind will bring
i think of you
as you are here
in my heart
forever dear

in this moment
driving in my car
children noises
sound so far
my mind wanders
to thoughts of you
as tears fall
our love was true

in this moment
out in my yard
that tree now blossoming
a memory jarred
sitting in my car
you said to me
"How beautiful!"
now a memory

in this moment
song in my head
"thank you
for being a friend"
a show we watched
i bought you the dvd
i'll sing out loud
and remember thee

in this moment
while at the zoo
i find myself
thinking of you
your compliments
things you said
always running
through my head

in every moment
thoughts of you
how would you respond?
what would you do?
the answers i know
they're in my heart
where you now reside
lest we be apart

i hope one day
to embrace you again
to laugh and love you
releasing the pain
i miss you, i miss you
i miss you so much
i long for one moment
to feel your touch
your warm arms
pulling me in
i can't believe
how long it's been

in this moment
right now, the one we are in
i'm thinking of you
where to begin?
i miss you, i love you
i'm holding you close
i'm making you proud
and i suppose...
i'm working on letting you go
just a bit
i know you'd want that
so i'll sit and i'll knit
and i'll smile deep inside
you know the kind I mean?
and i'll hold my babies:
melia, drew, and dean
and i'll love them as hard
as you loved me
and i'll be grateful
for eternity
for this blessed life
bestowed upon me
and most of all -
for my family

mama, i miss you each and every day...and while my heart still hurt with loss, it is also filled with joy and love. thank you.

I Love New York!

2011-04-13T12:08:00.006-04:00

I love love love NYC so it was really exciting to bring the kids to the city this past weekend. Chris & I spent 6 years in NY together...and it's where our love grew, where we got engaged, began our life as a married couple, and made our first baby. In addition to all that, I am a true traveler at heart...and the diversity of people & experiences which NYC offers ignites my soul! I love the hustle and bustle, the cafes & restaurants, the museums, the people, the organized chaos :) I would love to find myself living in a city ~perhaps new york city~ again someday. For now, the 'burbs are where I raise my family...close to my own family. But, NYC, you've got a piece of my heart.

Well, we had a great weekend with the kids in NY/NJ. We drove into the city, arriving at the Natural History Museum around 12:45pm. The kids were thrilled to see the dinosaur exhibits which dominated two floors! The museum actually has the biggest collection of dinosaur fossils in the WORLD. For my boys, ages 3 1/2 and 5 1/2, that is COOL. We also saw the habitat exhibits with loads of animals...which they loved. Ingrid & Stephen met us at the museum and it was fun to catch up while touring the museum. We appreciate them coming out to meet us!!

After the museum visit, we met up with Chris & Ruowen outside (around 3pm) and we walked through Central Park to a playground around 87th Street. The kids got to run around a bit ~ it was a fantastic, beautiful, sunny day!! Melia cried upon leaving the playground...she loves playing outdoors and is quite an active little girl!

Following the playground, we went to Jersey City to the Liscio's! They were amazing and hosted all FIVE of us in their two bedroom apartment. They are expecting their first baby next month - and hopefully we didn't scare them too much ;) We went out for pizza and got the kids to bed around 8pm. All 3 kids slept in the same room...which was interesting. Melia was excited; Dean was turning the star-light nightlight off; the boys came out a few times. Overall, it was fine. Melia woke them in the middle of the night with her crying (she had a cold, poor thing) but they fell back asleep.

Sunday, after pancakes and Wall-E, we took a little walk. We stopped to enjoy some gelato :) and we were back on the road around 12:30. Overall, it was a great trip. We are so appreciative of Chris & Ruowen's hospitality and kindness. We're so lucky to have such great friends!! Best part of all: The boys LOVED NY!!! This means the world to me. I don't want my kids to be afraid of cities or dislike traveling. I want them to enjoy new experiences (like me!)...and they do. I hope we'll be more adventurous in the future...and continue embracing new experiences as a family of five. It's just such fun!

15 months - Melia

2011-04-04T21:59:00.002-04:00

My sweet Melia is blossoming! She has a playful sense of humor. She follows direction like nobody's business. She's walking, climbing, running, throwing balls, trying to dress herself (without success), self-feeding, and talking! She's got quite a few words now: bye, hi, daddy, cheese, please, shoes, go, hot, dean, up, off, and bobby (who knows WHY but I'm often referred to by this name!). She loves hugging, cuddling, reading books, playing with trucks, cars, dolls, tricycles, swings, slides, playing ball. She is helpful with cleaning up, taking things out of the dishwasher, cleaning up spills, and sweeping ;) Her favorite foods are pasta (like mommy), salad, breads, melon, squash, pees, bananas... She's often teasing Dean or laughing at Drew. All of the kids are so affectionate and playful with one another! It's been great fun seeing her true, happy self emerge. Tomorrow she goes for her 1-year well visit 3 months late. I delayed the visit because I don't want to give her shots! I still don't - may bail out tomorrow. Anyway, I am still grateful every day for such an incredible blessing. She is a delightful little girl!

Drew's Blogging!!

2011-03-31T21:20:00.002-04:00

Drew loves to read and write. It's one of the most exciting things he learned in kindergarten. So, to encourage this new love, I decided to let him start a blog - or online journal. He can type whenever he wants, about whatever he wants. And I will not correct his work. He is free to just enjoy his writing. Of course, writing coupled with computer time is a double win. He is beyond excited about this! So, he wrote twice today :) I hope he'll write daily, but that may not be possible. Regardless of frequency, it's good practice for him...and it'll be fun to see the progress. Here's his blog address: www.kardoscrew.blogspot.com - as in "What's New with the Kardos Crew" I hope he sticks with it!

Goodbye

2011-02-20T21:40:00.006-05:00

On February 4th, my grandmother (Mary Laurelli) ~ Mama~ died. Her health had not been good, although I can't believe it was 5 years ago when I wrote entries worried that we were losing Mama. Amazingly, she kept fighting...through open heart surgeries, diabetes, lung disease. She was so strong. The permanency of my loss saddens me. I know her being gone is better for her ~ she is in peace ~ but it hurts my heart that I will never again be able to see her, hold her, listen to her, be with her. I have always wanted to make her proud (and I know I did) and oddly, I still want that. She left an impression on me that will last for the rest of my life. That is one of the gifts she gave me: she taught me to be someone worthy of respect, who makes good choices, supports family and friends, and has good manners.

We had a beautiful farewell to Mama. I chose to view the funeral & lunch as a celebration of her life; and that it was. I did all I could to participate in the planning and help my mom: I wrote the obituary, called family & friends, helped pick the casket and flowers, chose the music for the mass, gathered pictures and filled collages, and shared a eulogy at the funeral. It meant so much to have such a big part in this day. As important as a wedding is to a bride, this funeral was for me...to honor my grandmother in a proper way. To bid her farewell the way she lived her life: with grace.

Mama and I were so close. We had a mutual respect and love for one another that will never be replaced. So few people in one's life love...truly love you. She truly loved me. And I truly loved her.

My eulogy was from the heart. I traced the many paths her life took, and the strengths she showed through those experiences. I concluded with a poem I wrote for -and shared with- her about a year ago. You see, I always knew I'd share a eulogy. I knew she'd want me to ~ she loved my writing...and she loved me. I wanted to do it for her. The poem I wrote is below. She actually carried it in her bag (sharing it with friends and family) over the past year. She loved it! I'm so happy that she knew I how felt about her; and that my fear of her dying didn't inhibit me from loving with all my heart. In fact, I still love her with my whole heart.

Lessons Learned from Mama

She’s always been a role model to me

An educated woman and graduate of RISD

Hard working, motivated

Leaving others quite fascinated

Fashionable clothing and creative designs

An inner light that truly shines

A generous heart and selfless friend

A woman on whom I could always depend

I’ve always admired her strength and ambition

She truly helped to shape my vision

The lessons she taught me I hold close to my heart

And to my own children I will impart:

Work hard and you will achieve

Trust yourself and believe

Give back to the world; show appreciation

Look toward your family for inspiration

Be good to your friends; they enrich your life

Keep your promises; be a good wife

Open your home; bring people together

A good meal can be enjoyed in all kinds of weather

Work hard, laugh often; enjoy the luxuries you can afford

But never forget what matters most; it should not be ignored

Family comes first – and this I believe

Is the greatest lesson I will heed

Thank you, Mama, for these lessons I’ve learned

And all the love you shared

Thank you for believing in me

I’ve always know you cared

Know I will share these lessons – these gifts

With my children too

“Be strong, work hard

And whatever you dream of doing…DO!”

The teacher in me

2011-02-02T15:57:00.004-05:00

We had another snow day today. On the last snow day Mrs. B sent Drew home (from Kindergarten, mind you) with a 25 page "fun" packet. It was loaded with crossword puzzles, word searches, addition and subtraction pages, reading comprehension exercises.... No joke. Did I mention he's FIVE? Well, while I thought the packet was a big excessive (um...we needed time to build snowmen, bake cupcakes, and play games too!!), I liked that she sent him with some work to do. THIS snow day, however, she did not send home work. It was equally as anticipated as the last snow day so I imagine she got some complaints about the packet. Well, the teacher in me decided Drew would do some work...as well as bake cookies, make valentine hearts, and play games ;)

So, we worked on Drew's spelling list. Yes, he has spelling words!! This week he's learning how to spell the 7 days of the week. First, I wrote each word on different colored paper and cut out all the letters. I had him arrange the words in order. Then I had him write them in his journal and spell them aloud several times. We scrambled up and re-organized the words he struggled with. We revisited this a couple of times. And, guess what? He knows how to spell them all. I hope he remembers for his quiz tomorrow!!

1-1-11

2011-01-01T15:23:00.011-05:00

We survived another holiday season...and enjoyed every minute of it! From home made cookies (dozens upon dozens!) to shopping, wrapping gifts & decorating, we had FUN!

Melia turned ONE two days later :) I spent some time reflecting on her birth...and admiring the lovely girl she is becoming. She is really just the sweetest, most loving, happiest little girl! I adore her. Not one day goes by where I don't look at her and thank the world that she came into my life. She completes me.

New Year's Eve was rather mellow. Chris & I had a lobster dinner, toasted midnight with countries around the world, watched a movie, and actually stayed up to welcome 1-1-11!

2010 was a wonderful year...and I'm excited for the adventures that lie ahead! xoxo

Autumn

2010-10-08T13:47:00.006-04:00

Time is slipping away...and there is SO MUCH to write about and yet, I lack inspiration.
I will let some photos do the talking.

Dear Drew

2010-08-29T21:36:00.004-04:00

Dear Drew,

Tomorrow is your first day of kindergarten. I can't believe the time has come where I must let you go out into the world -for a full day!- and trust that others will care for you as I have done. The school supplies are bought, new clothes are laid out, your lunch is made, and you are asleep.

When I asked you today how you felt about going to school, you replied, "Happy!" "What are you most excited about?" I asked. "Playing outside and doing arts and crafts," you told me with a smile. It warms my heart that you are excited. However, I will confess...as my bedtime draws near I find myself filled with some angst. A bit of sadness sweeps over me when I imagine dropping you off tomorrow morning. I will stay on the black top with you as you scope out the other children and play a bit. I will smile with pride as you get in line with Mrs. B and prepare to head into your classroom. I will wave goodbye as you walk into the building. I'll hide my sad eyes behind my glasses...and remind myself that I knew this day would come. Everyone has to grow up. You are ready for this. Everything will be ok.

Good luck, Drew. I hope you come home wearing the same smile I saw on your face this afternoon. I'll be waiting for that. I love you con toda mi corazon.

xoxo
Mommy

Color pictures from photo shoot :)

2010-07-22T14:03:00.000-04:00

Black and White photos

2010-07-21T14:31:00.003-04:00

Here are some photos from our family photo shoot with Caitlin Maloney. We met her at my mom's house in Bonnet and went down to Bonnet Beach for some outdoor pics.

I have a Love-Hate Relationship...

2010-07-21T14:15:00.003-04:00

...with the pacifier. I know it's there to PACIFY HER -and it works- but I worry I'm taking away the opportunity for her to learn to PACIFY HERSELF. Melia is the only one of my kids to take the pacifier so I don't know how long it'll be around, how we'll wean her of it, and how she'll do without it. I do know the idea of taking it away causes me anxiety (and it's only been 6 months!).

At the moment, I can put Melia down for sleep awake and she may play a bit (in her pack in play by my bed)...then she pops in her paci and drifts off to sleep. Sometimes after a nap I'll find her with an upside pacifier (so cute) or an entirely different paci from the one she started with! I love that she can put it in and take it out and doesn't mind if it's upside down. It could be pink, green, blue, big, small, round, flat - she doesn't care. She'll take it! Must be the easy-going baby #3. Maybe I should experiment and put her down for nap tomorrow withOUT the pacifier. Could she be SO easy going that she can sleep without it? Hmmmm.....

moving forward...

2010-07-17T17:08:00.005-04:00

Bonnet Shores had a big community yard sale today - and I was one of fifty to participate! I spent a few days digging through closets, boxes, and the garage to find items that we no longer used anymore. Among the things I sold were three baby swings (all different styles of course), a bassinet (which was mostly used for Drew's first three months of life), a vibrating chair (which no one ever really liked), and baby clothes. At first I relished in the money I'd made, the space I created in my house, the new homes which would enjoy these items....and then I got sad. I have had those items as staples in my house for the last 5 years. They represent my babies. MY BABIES. And I realize, sigh, that I'm no longer making babies. Done. Terminado. Finished. I love babies soooo much. I love them so much I facilitate pregnancy & new mom groups for a living....I'm a DONA certified post partum doula. I LOVE BABIES. It's so hard to imagine not having any more. My head understands that they cost money; our house is running out of space; I'm not getting any younger. But my heart wants to continue to grow our family, to have more cute, little Kardoses running around. I know I will long to feel a baby kicking inside my belly...long to nurse another little peanut...long to inhale the breath of new life. I can only hope my work can fulfill those longings ~ or that they subside with time. I need to move forward, embrace the three beautiful children we've created, be thankful for the blessings of my life, and rejoice in the closet space now available :)

So, here are my three "babies":

Melia, 6 1/2 months

Dean, 3 years

Drew, (almost) 5 years

Melia - 6 months 10 days :)

2010-07-06T21:39:00.002-04:00

Melia has "grown up" so much within the past month. She started solids; she rolls all around the room (and bed! - time to set up a pack-n-play in my room); she sits up by herself; she can drink a bit from a big girl cup. She continues to be full of smiles...and when she's not, she is easily soothed in someone's arm or carrier. She has a lovely disposition. She's a bit adventurous and likes thrills...like being thrown in the air or hung upside down. She is happy to see all friendly people, but especially likes her family. And-super exciting-she wears barrettes! I love it! Here's more...

Weight: 15 pounds, 5 oz.
Height: 26 1/2 inches
Foods she's tried: baby oatmeal, cantaloupe, avocado, banana, squash, prune, pear, peach, peas, sweet potato
Favorite toys: anything she can put in her mouth!
Dislikes: exersaucer (not a big fan), angry voices, getting dressed after co-shower, brother Dean manually moving her head to look at him
Recent excursions (past two weeks): Southwicks Zoo, Roger Williams Zoo, Bonnet Beach, NK Beach, Mommy-Baby Yoga, Library, Casey Farm, farmer's market, Hike at Goddard Park
Sleeping Habits: bed around 7:30pm (after shower with mommy), wake about 3 times/night and mommy nurses (perhaps responding too quickly!), up at 7:15am...leave bedroom by 8am. Nap 9-10am; 1:30-4pm (on a "good" day)
Teeth: NONE yet, but definitely teething

Spring 2010

2010-06-11T15:22:00.002-04:00

Co-Sleeping Conundrum

2010-05-16T20:24:00.003-04:00

I am constantly evolving as a mom. Perfect example: Drew slept in a bassinet in our room while we lived at my mom's house, but moved to his own room as soon as we settled in our new home (he was 2 months old). For Dean, I set up the arm's reach co-sleeper (mini crib) and he would sleep there, in the swing, on my chest until he was about 3-4 months old. Then he too moved into his own room with his own crib. Melia, now 4 1/2 months, is exclusively sleeping in my bed. I'm co-sleeping! I never would've thought I could've lasted this long, but Melia is so easy to sleep with! I remember Dean grunting and snorting, keeping me up all night, but Melia is a quiet, calm sleeper. When she's sleeping, that is!

Here's the conundrum: I love co-sleeping with Melia. I love seeing her smiling face first thing every morning. I love knowing she's right there beside me all the time. I love that when she wants to nurse I just pop her on, without having to go get her or worry about putting her back down. However, I feel that my presence is taking away her ability to self soothe. Melia wakes anywhere from two to five times a night (seriously!) and I end up nursing -or giving her a pacifier- every time. Could I be responding too quickly to her small fusses? Definitely. Could I let her work it out? Maybe. Why don't I? Because I'm right there! I don't want her to cry; and I don't want to lie there wondering if she's going to fuss or sleep.

So, I wonder. Are there any co-sleeping, breastfeeding moms out there whose babies sleep through the night? That's what I really want to know. Does everyone respond as quickly as I do...encouraging babies to expect to nurse all night? I don't need her to sleep 12 hours...or even 8 hours, but it sure would be nice to sleep a 4-6 hour stretch again. I just wish I could achieve this while STILL co-sleeping...because I love sleeping with Melia. ♥

(early morning photo)

Rights of Passage

2010-05-09T21:28:00.004-04:00

The last few months have been huge in the life of Dean. He transitioned to the toddler bed (after climbing out of his crib again and again...), abandoned the booster seat, and stopped wearing diapers!! I read "Oh Crap Potty Training" as soon as it was available. I was so tired of changing his size HUGE diapers...and tired of dealing with his constant-state-of-motion while I tried to assemble clean diapers. Ugh. I'm happy to report my little boy went from toddler to ready for preschool in about a month's time. So exciting! And quite recently I've noticed some of those terribly annoying 2.5 yr. old behaviors are dissipating. Not all, but some. Change is here. Just shy of 3 yrs old, Dean has become a real "big boy."

And did I mention he now does 24-piece puzzles on his own? I have NO idea where that came from because two months ago he wouldn't touch his 12 piece puzzles. Maybe knowing that Drew does 170 piece puzzles inspired him...or it was the trucks and cars on the puzzles. In any case, he can sit still longer, be more involved in projects and puzzles, and is much more ready for school! It's been a right-of-passage to preschool! Is it September yet?

Kindergarten?!?

2010-04-30T14:51:00.003-04:00

Drew will always be my little guy...even if he is the oldest. He's my first baby; and just about the sweetest, most sensitive boy I've ever met. It's a challenge parenting a sensitive child ~ especially one who goes inward when hurt. I seldom know what has set him off when he's upset; and it takes a patient inquisition to unveil the situation. That sensitivity is part of what I love so much about Drew, but also what worries me. I want him to be strong and confident, able to stand up to others for himself, and expressive of his feelings. I don't want other kids to take advantage of him or hurt him. Alas, life is not easy for anyone - and we cannot shelter our children from the world. I can only sit by and support him, help him grow, and hope that together we make the right decisions.

So, speaking of decision, we had a BIG one to make: Where to send Drew to kindergarten.

While our public elementary school is well reputable, we applied to two charter schools. Compass School is where I teach Spanish part time; and I've always loved the community. Their mission is to teach social responsibility and environmental sustainability. The kids are like a big family - and well, I'm there!

Kingston Hill was intended to be a Spanish-English bilingual school. At present, not all of the teachers are bilingual, but Spanish is introduced at all grade levels. However, it is a beautiful, new space with smaller class sizes and a great community.

Both charter school have a random lottery for selection. Drew did not get into the Compass School, but he did get into Kingston Hill Academy. After much deliberation here's how I made my decision:

Why Kingston Hill?

*Full Day Kindergarten
(Drew will be 5 in August, one of the youngest in his grade. Some students will be a whole year older! I feel the full day K could be instrumental in helping prepare him for 1st grade. Plus, he loves learning. What would he be doing home for half the day? Shuffling kids around...playing with his 9 month sister? He'd have so much more fun with friends at school, right?)

*Smaller class size
(Making it an easier transition from the preschool class! And hopefully allowing for a more intimate community.)

*Bilingual approach
(Hey - I'm a Spanish teacher!)

The only disadvantages of Kingston Hill is that Drew is less likely to meet the "neighborhood kids"and the school only goes up to grade 5. So, he's going to have to switch schools (and friends) at some point. My thinking now is that he'll switch in 1st grade - and then go to Stony Lane, our public elementary school. Hopefully he'll be a step ahead academically and the transition won't be too difficult. Otherwise, if we love the school, he can merge with other kids at the middle school level.

I've taken my preschool and Kindergarten choices quite seriously. I am considering the needs of the individual child more than anything...and I hope I'm making the right choices. Sometimes I feel like we're conducting a social experiment here: all three of my kids might end up at different preschools AND different elementary schools. What a trip! But each child is unique, every opportunity new, and we hope to consider their best interests above all!

a daughter

2010-04-30T14:08:00.004-04:00

i dreamt of having a daughter my entire life. i wrote in journals since i was about 10 years old; and i kept them for my daughter. i thought maybe she'd want to know the little me when she got big. i kept my class projects, my cabbage patch kids, strawberry shortcake friends, and barbie dolls. i even held on to my entire collection of sweet valley high books! i guess i expected my little girl would be just like me.

then i gave birth to two boys. two fabulous, curious, silly, delightful boys. and i wondered if i would ever have a girl. it had never even occurred to me that i might not have a daughter. i was thankful for my two sweet boys, but i wondered if i might feel as though something was always missing ~ if i didn't have a little girl. would the boys care about my old journals? would they be impressed with the scrapbooks i made, or the baby calendars i kept for them? would they go shopping with me...or spend hours on the phone chatting about their day? i realized what a gift it would be to raise two sensitive, gentle boys - but i wasn't complete.

by chance - by some great, fantastic chance - i conceived a girl. and i look at those rosy cheeks and big, bright eyes and i am so in love. i love all of my kids equally, i do. but the difference is that now my world is complete. i am complete.

We are family...

2010-04-08T14:47:00.004-04:00

I have learned so many things as a mother - that perhaps one can never know until he/she becomes a parent. Like...how it feels to be the only person who can soothe your crying baby. Or what it feels like to love someone with your whole heart - even when they poop their pants and then hit YOU! What I've learned is how to love and truly be loved. I've learned how incredibly important FAMILY is - and that a true family works through hard times by communicating, forgiving, and moving forward. I have to forgive my kids (and myself!) every day. I have learned that despite our differences, our faults, our mistakes...we are all worthy of love. We all begin as an innocent child - so easy to love. And as our mature selves evolve -and we challenge the world around us (and our parents) - we still deserve and need love...perhaps even MORE!

I'm not sure where I'm going with this. Perhaps a message to my own family, perhaps a reminder to myself. Keep loving - even on crappy days. Forgive. Embrace. Love.

“Life is but a walking shadow, a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage and then is heard no more; it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.” - Shakespeare

Do you believe this?

Update!

2010-03-24T13:18:00.008-04:00

This is some of Drew's latest artwork. We appreciate his love of color - his pictures always make us smile :) I think it's a good reflection of his personality and love of life!

Below is "Rainbow" as drawn by Dean, age 2 1/2. He took all the colors of the rainbow and drew big circles. He is very creative and imaginative...but I was definitely caught off guard when, upon throwing his poop into the big potty he exclaimed, "My poop is like a rainbow!"

And while Melia is too young for artwork, she has begun really "taking in" the world around her. She loves watching her brothers, hearing songs, and smiling :)

Family Fun in February

2010-03-06T12:17:00.002-05:00

7 weeks, 5 days

2010-02-19T13:27:00.003-05:00

Melia will be 8 weeks old on Sunday. Time is flying by, as I knew it would. In addition to having many smiling moments each day, she is bringing lots of smiles to the rest of the family!

What's life like?

We're beginning to develop an evening schedule. After the boys go to bed, Chris and I spend time keeping her calm (nursing, bouncing, holding, etc.) til she falls asleep for the night (in my bed) around 10-10:30pm. As of this week, she's been sleeping about 5 hours, nursing, then going back to sleep for another 3-3 1/2 hours. She tends to wake up around 9am and then join us downstairs. And although we have no day schedule or routine, I'm feeling pretty good about where we are at right now!

At this age/stage, Melia loves...smiling familiar faces, bouncing on the yoga ball with daddy, nursing, being held, swinging, co-sleeping, hearing songs from her big brothers.
She doesn't like...having her hair washed - or having clothing pulled over her head, car rides!!!, when mommy eats chocolate, being alone.

We have introduced a bottle twice - and she took 2 ounces each time. I know we should offer it more often (I can't have her refusing a bottle as Dean did!), but I am always with her so why not nurse?!? I do pump & freeze about 5 ounces a day - and I'm thinking I'll end up donating a bunch like I did before. It feels good to do that! I'm also trying to encourage the pacifier at night - and during occasional car rides. A pacifier would be so much easier than rocking, shushing, bouncing...right?

I love holding Melia, seeing her sleeping, and watching her eyes sparkle when she smiles. I feel so blessed to have this beautiful girl. And her brothers love her too...and to know I have created these three beautiful children with my amazing husband brings me to tears (of joy!).

Best friends at play

2010-02-08T13:13:00.003-05:00

I love days like this. The boys have been playing so nicely together. I feel so happy for them - that they have each other. How wonderful to grow up with someone you love so much; who loves you back; who you can fight with and quickly forgive; who will give you space when you need it (well, most of the time); and who enjoys your company more than anything! They are truly best friends. I admire them and feel so blessed that THESE are MY kids! They are awesome!!

Melia - the story of her name

2010-01-11T15:06:00.003-05:00

Melia, pronounced "Muh-Lee-Uh," has several different meanings for us.

First, and most importantly, we chose this name because it's the Hawaiian form of "Mary." I have always wanted to name my daughter (should I be so blessed to have a daughter) after my grandmother. However, I didn't want to use the traditional Mary, Maria, or Marie. When I was pregnant with Dean I began looking into variants of "Mary" and Malia was a name I fell in love with immediately.

Melia also happens to be the name of our hotel in Spain; and I really wanted to choose a name with some kind of Spanish meaning.

Melia is a Hawaiian name for the plumeria or frangipani flower - and I love the idea of a girl's name also being a flower name. How beautiful! It's like a visual symbol of her name. And isn't it a beautiful flower? I love it!

Melia...Melia...Melia...I think the name itself is lovely, but I what I love most is how many beautiful meanings it represents for us.

Melia Joy's Birth Story

2010-01-03T14:29:00.007-05:00

Melia Joy Kardos arrived on December 27, 2009 (12 days late) at 1:29pm! It was a long pregnancy and when labor day was actually here, I was relieved and excited. I had been having contractions daily, though inconsistantly, since December 4th...and every night I'd go to bed thinking - wishing - that THIS would be the night. As I grew increasingly more uncomfortable in my pregnant body, I also grew more eager and excited to hold my little girl. The night before she was born we took a long family walk where I lunged and charged ahead, trying to bring on labor. With each contraction I would squat and rock my body in hopes of bringing her lower. Around 9:30pm on the 26th my contractions came a bit stronger and they lasted throughout the night. Somewhere around midnight I began timing them; and they were about 7 minutes apart, lasting 1 minute each. Chris & I decided we should try to rest; and I layed down again. I awoke around 2am feeling more intensity and felt eager to prepare for a trip to Pawtucket Memorial! Chris & I organized the house a bit: assembled the garbage and recycling (Christmas had just exploded in our living room!), washed dishes, finished two loads of laundry...then we re-assessed. Maybe we should try to rest until things were a bit further along. So, back to bed for a bit. Finally, three hours later, I thought we should call the midwife. We spoke to Michelle Palmer at 6:30 and told her we'd head up to the hospital in an hour or so. We called my mom; sent text messages to our doulas, Shelley Harvey & Merav Minkin; and took showers. My mom came around 7am and took Drew & Dean out to breakfast around 7:30. Chris and I decided to take a nice walk around the neighborhood to keep things moving. When I was in labor with Drew and Dean we had walked for hours in Bonnet Shores...they were beautiful summer days. Well, on THIS walk, it began to rain...downpour, in fact...and so we came home. We decided to head to the hospital - contractions were 3-5 minutes apart.

I was greeted by Shelley & Merav and after a quick check-in, we all went up to the maternity floor. I was monitored a bit, encouraged to eat & drink some juice, and allowed to walk around. I was 4 cm dialated upon arrival and after some lunging & squatting on the stairs, I quickly progressed to 6 cm. The rest moved along fast. I was monitored, given an IV for my antibiotics & fluids, and spent an hour squatting and working with my contractions to help my baby girl decend.

We had been given labor room #4 - the big birthing room - and while I never used the shower (although I was quite heated and could've used one!), it was a great room nonetheless! Shelley & Merav had lit the flameless candles and turned off the lights...it smelled like lavendar and vanilla...they had juice and ice for me...a cool, damp cloth for my forehead...peaceful music playing. It was so calm and peaceful. I spent a good amount of time squatting at the edge of the bed - there was a rail which was perfect for support. My "team" was fabulous in keeping me cool, helping me focus on breathing well and keeping the sounds deep to release the pelvis, helping my body let go of tension, and assuring me I was doing well!

After some time I moved onto the bed and maintained an upright position for birthing. It felt, to me, like a long time, but the "record" said I only pushed for 15 minutes. Ha! At 1:29pm, Melia Joy was born...and was a perfect, healthy 9 pound 8 ounce baby girl!

It is such a gift to have been able to experience this beautiful, natural birth...and I am so blessed to have a healthy little girl to add to my family. I feel like I waited my whole life for this ~ my family is complete and I am so in love.

Michelle Palmer (see right photo) was absolutely amazing. In our dimly lit room she used only a small mirror to assist in the delivery process. She encouraged me to trust my body...and I was able to do so because I had such great trust in HER. I could never ask for a better midwife. I wish she attended the births of all my children.

Merav & Shelley were so awesome. They were instrumental in setting the stage, keeping the environment calm and helping me stay comfortable. Their support allowed my labor to progress naturally and their assurance kept me strong. I am so grateful that BOTH of them helped create this beautiful experience and were able to attend Melia's birth.

Chris was an important element of my "birthing team" as well! He was calm & gentle and supported my dreams of a natural birth. He listened to countless talks of what facilitates a natural birth, how a partner can be supportive, and what I dreamed of. He listened on my "blue" pregnancy days; he worked hard to give me down time so I could rest - especially when my back was in so much pain; he has been an incredible partner and father :)

Melia has been an amazing baby! She is adored by her two older brothers. When she cries, which is so seldom, Drew will start singing to her...anything from "Twinkle, Twinkle" to "Girl, Put Your Records On". Both Drew and Dean love to show Melia their lovies - often laying their "friends" across her body. Dean ask for her every time he wakes up or comes in the house, "Where's the baby?" He always wants the baby to wake up and insists she come downstairs with us. He'll bring books to the couch while I'm nursing and we'll read together. Melia is a strong nurser, a great sleeper, and loves to cuddle. She's easy to sleep with because she doesn't make much noise! Our first doctor appt. is tomorrow - and I can't wait to see how much she weighs.

I was scared to birth such a big baby...but I trusted my body and it went smoothly! I am grateful for her size as she eats and sleeps well. She seems so peaceful too...perhaps it's a reflection of her lovely birth. What a beautiful way to be greeted by the world!

Third Trimester

2009-09-23T14:34:00.003-04:00

The third trimester (much like the first trimester) has been /will be a bit emotional for me.
I very clearly remember the final weeks of my pregnancy with Dean. I was weepy; I worried about how my relationship with Drew might change. I thought more about what I was taking away from him (me!) and less about what he'd really be gaining (how was I to know they'd be best friends?). It helps to have already been through this before, but it doesn't make me less anxious. While I think it's completely "normal" to carry both excitement and fear with me, I wish I could let go a bit. I need to trust that somehow I will manage three kids by myself (a VERY scary thought); they will all get what they need from us as parents; I will love them ALL with all my heart.

The beginning of this pregnancy seemed to have passed so slowly...yet right now I imagine this third trimester will FLY. I just want to be pregnant. Not a mom of three just yet. Happily pregnant with a little girl in my belly. Life is good right now. REALLY good. I want to treasure each of these "easy" days ahead because things are about to get a whole lot more complicated!

BIRTHDAYs

2009-09-22T20:24:00.011-04:00

We have a pretty big BIRTH day coming up...I'm reminded by the fetal movements I feel each day. And we recently celebrated a few other important birthdays :) Isn't celebrating grand?!?

June 23rd - Dean turned TWO!

August 11th - Drew turned FOUR!

September 14th - Mommy turned thirty-five!

Good Times

2009-09-22T20:00:00.013-04:00

We had a fantastic summer. In fact, we were having so much fun that I didn't have time for blogging! So, here's a recap of the last two months: Days spent on Bonnet Beach, playing with friends at Breezy Acres, a visit to the Children's Museum, a fantastic day at the Dinosaur Place, many visits to the zoo, swimming at Diego's pool, hikes on cooler days, playing at various playgrounds, outside summer concerts... LOTS of good times!

Two great pieces of work!

2009-09-14T20:21:00.003-04:00

As a mother, facilitator of pregnancy & new moms groups, and now a DONA trained post partum doula, my world is full of discussions, literature, and information related to pregnancy and parenting. What amazes me is how much there is to know; and after having birthed two sons, I am still learning about childbirth and parenting. It's facinating. My two recent book discoveries have left me wondering why I didn't hear of these books earlier? Ina May's Guide to Childbirth will certainly be my first recommended read for pregnant women as I move forward in my work. And for new parents (and parents-to-be) The Vital Touch by Sharon Heller will be my second choice of literature. I greatly appreciate the anthropological approach each book offers - reflecting upon centuries of experiences as well as comparing the experiences of the US women with others around the world. But more than anything I am happy to find a return to what is natural, what makes sense for human beings, what feels right. I confess to being excited for this third child to be born - to give birth to her in a completely natural way. Mind-body connection. No fear. Trust in women and faith in my own strength. We were made for this. And I didn't have to be sold on the benefits of baby-wearing, I love my moby wrap! I understand the pitfalls of "containers" as well as the practicality of them. Balance. Trust my judgement. Hold and nurture this last baby as much as I can. I can't wait!

Long Island Fun with Friends

2009-07-21T16:04:00.006-04:00

We had so much fun at the Riverhead Aquarium with friends!
It was a special day for Drew because he had Mommy & Daddy all to himself :) Dean stayed behind with Mama so he could have some special time with her. Mama took Dean on walks; they hung out at the

beach; and he had a sleep over! Drew got to see Daddy's high school friends Dave & Rob - and their families. The aquarium was awesome and all the kids had fun! Drew & Violet were holding hands by the end of the day...so cute. And while it was a brief visit, we enjoyed some good conversations with old friends!

Third time's a charm?!?

2009-07-21T15:51:00.002-04:00

I'm still searching for something "charming" about this pregnancy. I'm in my 19th week - and it has been the most difficult, stressful, exhausting pregnancy I've had! (And I'm not even half way there!) Ok, I haven't spent days upon days vomiting - lucky me - but I've had my share of ailments:

* 14 weeks of light bleeding nearly EVERY day ~ leaving me to feel little confidence in the pregnancy and stressing about the baby's health.

* Random cramping throughout first trimester - adding more fuel to my concerns.

* Lots of tearfulness...feelings of worry, sadness, and fear. VERY unusual for me and very unpleasant.

* Headaches, stomach aches, fatigue, sleeplessness, and general discomfort. It could all be typical for pregnancy, but it wasn't typical of MY pregnancies.

Feeling badly while caring for two young boys isn't easy. Already (in my second trimester still!) I'm feeling out of breath when walking up a flight of stairs. WHAT!?! Already I've gained 14 pounds...scary. I have a feeling this is going to be a loooooooong pregnancy. I can only hope that growing inside is a beautiful, healthy baby. Then it's all worth it, right?

Weekend in NH!

2009-07-14T14:12:00.006-04:00

We had a great weekend in New Hampsire with our friends, the Batlas! We went to StoryLand for a couple of hours on Friday and Saturday...and had a beautiful hike on Sunday. Fortunately, the weather cooperated and the days couldn't have been better. Drew & Alex shared a bunk bed (first sleep over ever!!) and did really well. Drew slept on the top bunk - I was so impressed! After the kids went to bed, the adults had game night...which I always love. In fact, the evening adult time was my favorite part of the trip. But, as far as Drew is concerned, the water rides were the BEST :)

Dean is TWO!

2009-06-30T18:20:00.006-04:00

Seriously?!? Two?!? It doesn't seem that long ago when Dean was born...and Drew was turning two. To compare the boys seems ridiculous. Dean did not get two years of my undivided attention. He did not get consistant music class, gym class, at-home lessons from Mommy, the-world-revolves-around-you (and only you) care. I'm okay with that. With baby #3 on the way, I have no choice but to accept that my time is limited, divided, and at times unavailable.

All that being said...here's Dean at 2 years of age:

*Height: 25th percentile
*Weight: 25th percentile
*Words: more than I can count!! This is a great thing because he "bloomed" a bit later than Drew.
*Sentences: "Daddy's at work." "I wanna go downstairs." "Where's elmo?" etc. Yes, he can speak in sentences!!
*Silly thing to note: Loves making funny faces...and imitates the faces I make too.
*Favorite activities: Pushing lawn mower, taking walks, playing with trains
*Favorite "lovies": Blankie (of course), elmo, baby (my old cabbage patch which Drew had), ernie, cookie monster, grover
*Favorite songs: Twinkle, Twinkle, Hickory Dickory Dock, ABC, If you're happy and you know it
*Favorite person: Drew (without a doubt!!)

Dean continues to be a rockstar crib sleeper: 12 hours at night and a 2+ hour nap (12:30-3ish). He is learning to climb into his carseat - funny, he climbs on everything else quite easily. He still slides down the stairs on his belly unless I hold his hand. He does not watch tv. He loves being outside. He's a good eater. He doesn't cry when I wash his hair (Drew does!). He wakes up happy and plays in his crib...so sweet. He likes making people laugh. He has blonde hair :) and dimples when he smiles. He scrunches up his nose a lot and it's so cute. He is typically calm and gentle, but he may hit you if you take what he's playing with :( He shares well if you use words. He hates having his diaper changed, but has never peed/pooped in the potty. He loves to say, "Hola!" and says Hi to everyone everywhere. He can get his own snack from the closet - and fruit from the fruitbowl. He's learning to do his own seatbelt (fastening the top). He likes drinking from big boy cups and is quite good at it. He respects the boundaries of our property and plays in the yard/driveway without any trouble. He likes playing with boys but has more girl friends his age. He's most loving towards people he knows, a bit shy around strangers. He's so cute, rather petite, easy to love, pretty low-maintainance, seldom whines, and loves to play.

FUN!

2009-06-17T17:19:00.007-04:00

Is there anything better than eating delicious, red, ripe strawberries in June?!? Especially ones you've picked yourself? I think not. ALL of the photos I took at Schartner's Farm include strawberries-in-the-mouth. I guess you could say the boys enjoyed it!

Aside from the fact that we seriously almost got lost in Ryan Park today, it was an awesome hike. Dean started off zooming ahead and the two happily ran along the trail. After about 30 minutes, Dean lost his steam and I resorted to carrying him :( It was ok though - because at that point I thought I was lost and I wanted to keep a quick pace. We ended up crossing paths with the trail we walked on Monday...and all was good. Definitely one of my favorite hikes recently!

Three's a Charm

2009-06-17T13:02:00.003-04:00

I'm not going to lie. I'm scared to death to have three children. Every day I ask myself how I will manage three kids - or, even worse, three BOYS! My two boys have so much energy that I leave the house every day by 8:30am...return for naps...and run out again as soon as they awaken! Today we went to the Y at 8:30 (yoga class at 9am for me!!), followed by a trip to Schartner's Farm for strawberry picking with friends, then to Sophie's for coffee...home for naps and off to Ryan's Park for a hike upon waking. I am not complaining about the activities. It sure beats sitting around the house. I'm just wondering how I am going to do it all with THREE. How will I squeeze in time for nursing? Will Dean hold my hand when we walk across the parking lot? Will Drew carry the cooler so I can hold the baby AND Dean's hand? Will I remember to pack two sized diapers, sunscreens, three hats, snacks & drinks for everyone?!? Will the boys listen to me when I tell them to stop! What will the baby's needs be? Will I have time for each child individually? Will my mom still want to babysit...all three kids? Will I ever have time for myself?

Yes, I'm scared.

I'm going to create some mantras for myself. I will repeat these over and over until I believe them. I appreciate any additional words of wisdom or support anyone can offer.

*Everything is going to be ok.
*Slow down....
*People have been raising big families forEVER and they manage.
*Drew will be a big help.
*The kids will have each other.
*Big families are FUN.
*Dean and Drew will keep each other occupied.
*I have lots of good friends to play with us :)
*My mom will always be there.
*I have a supportive husband.
*Drew will be going to kindergarten in one year!
*I can nurse in the moby wrap.
*Babies are easy and can sleep on the go.
*I love my children.

It's going to be ok, right?

Sun is Shining!

2009-06-15T13:09:00.007-04:00

Finally the sun has returned to New England! Saturday we went for a hike in Exeter at Fishmerman's Cove. It's so beautiful there and we seldom see anyone else on the trails...so it feels like our own little forest! I love it. Today I took the boys to Ryan Park in North Kingstown (2 minutes from our home!) but the timing was off. We went when I got home from work - about an hour before naptime. Dean was cranky :( I tried to wear him in the ergo but he wasn't diggin' it. We'll try that hike again later this week. It's SO nice to be outside and hiking again. I love it!!

Lazy Mama

2009-06-04T12:45:00.003-04:00

Last night I went to see the film Orgasmic Birth which was hosted by Doulas of RI. The producer, Debra Pascali-Bonaro (who will be the one conducting my post-partum doula training) was there to discuss the film with the audience which was awesome!! The event lasted well past my bedtime and I found myself hitting the sack around 11:30pm. <<insert big yawn!>>

So, this morning when my alarm (aka: children) woke me up at 6:30am I was less than enthusiastic to start my day. Having rejoiced in their "independent play" in the basement the last few days , I decided that perhaps they might entertain themselves while I lay under the covers just a bit longer. I dressed Dean (unfortunately Drew can't change diapers...yet) and let the boys head downstairs around 7:40am. I lay there, half trying to sleep-half trying to listen, thinking how wonderful this was...the boys enjoying each other's company, the luxury of staying in bed, their new found independent play...

About 45 min later, I hear them walking upstairs and Drew says, "Dean, you can't put your fingers in your mouth. They're all dirty! I need to clean them." He heads into the bathroom and wets a facecloth. I'm thinking: Dirty?? What could've happened? Did Dean poop and take off his diaper? So, from the bedroom I ask, "Dirty? What happened?" And Drew responds, "Dean wrote on me and I wrote on him." Ut oh....time to get up.

I'm thinking he's talking about markers, which are really only for Drew to use as Dean is too young, and I'm pretty upset. Then I see Dean: BLUE GLUE ALL OVER HIS FACE! Ummm...what happened?? Well, Dean put the glue on Drew and he lathered Dean up! So, immediately I throw both boys into the bathtub. Fortunately, this children's glue was relatively easy to clean up - on both the boys and my coffee table. Thank goodness. I will add that they had legitimately been working on "projects" downstairs. Drew and Dean each had their own paper, which was beautifully adorned by colorful, sparkly glues, and there was minimal mess to be cleaned. And while I was upset that Dean was covered in a blue, sticky mess, I realized it was kind of my fault. I was a lazy mama with an awful migraine who did not want to get out of bed. I'm thrilled that the boys share such a special friendship right now and I'm glad they can play by themselves, but they still need to be supervised...or I'll be cleaning up the mess!

I would have loved to call in sick today. Ugh.

Still fighting off the migraine despite two cups of coffee.

Maybe I'll go back to bed...

Memorial Weekend

2009-05-27T14:43:00.003-04:00

Memorial Weekend has officially become my favorite holiday. What I most love about this "holiday" is the opportunity to bring so many friends together for a party...and reuniting with my college friends for a weekend of sunshine, bbqs, games, and laughter.

All of my picture are posted at http://www.kodakgallery.com/kardos - check out the fun!

Celebrating TODAY!

2009-05-01T15:26:00.006-04:00

Five years ago today, Chris and I were married at the Ocean Cliff in Newport. Despite all the excitement we've shared over these years together, this day - our wedding day - remains the happiest, most beautiful day of my life. I feel so blessed to have married such an amazing man, a caring and thoughtful father, an attentive husband, my best friend. This Fall we will celebrate 10 years of togetherness...which blows my mind. Here's to MANY more years of celebrating with the greatest love in my life.

Ode to my love

i love waking every morning

my true partner by my side

no matter how i'm feeling

in you i can confide

i love taking evening walks

playing ping pong too

i love hiking in the woods

with daddy, dean, and drew

i love that we are explorers

even without travel far

i love sitting in the living room

listening to you play guitar

i love nights out with our friends

or nights spent on our own

i love the family we created

and our beautiful home

i love that you are my partner

in the true sense of the word

i love that you can love me

even when i am absurd

i couldn't be more proud,

more happy or more blessed

and when we met 15 years ago

i never would've guessed

a friend i met in college

would be the love of my life

i want you to know

i'm so proud to be your wife

Spring Hikes!

2009-04-24T15:00:00.009-04:00

Since returning from Spain, I've been going to yoga classes twice a week at the Y (love it!) and I've spent many days walking & hiking with the boys (and friends). It's been wonderful to be more active...and to enjoy nature a bit each day. For the most part, I feel relaxed and energetic (at least til the evening crashes upon me!). Dean, however, is not the best hiker...so it is bringing me down a bit. Drew ROCKS and can hike miles...never gets tired or complains (til it's time to go home!)...and loves being the leader. Dean is often lagging behind - or asking to be carried. Sure, he's only 20 months so it's understandable. What is NOT cool is that he continues crying when in the back pack carrier. So I'll end up carrying my squirmy little guy on my hip - all 27 extra pounds of him. I guess it adds to the intensity of my workout! Oddly enough, he is awesome on the bike path and roads. He walked 2 miles yesterday. Here's the clencher: he pushes his lawn-mower. He'll walk for hours if he can push his silly little lawn-mower. Unfortunately I don't think a lawn-mower is safe on woodsy trails. I'm now hunting for an ideal front/side carrier for my almost-2-year-old. Suggestions are welcomed!!

Below are some of our pics. Even though I'm complaining a bit, we've had lots of fun!

Here is Dean in the ergo baby carrier which my friend Sarah lent me. We were walking out to Rome Point - and amazingly enough, Dean made it all the way to the beach! That's at least a mile! On the way back he was happy in the ergo. Drew, my champion hiker, walked there and back on his own.

Here we are at Goddard Park. We went for a nice afternoon walk with Wendy & Elena. Dean was up and down, up and down, up and down. It was so nice walking in the woods and then walking along the ocean cliff. It's an easy trail for the boys too.

Dean did great at the South County Bike Path. This time it was just the three of us. Both boys had their lawnmowers. We walked TWO miles and no one was carried at all. Granted, it took us about TWO hours, but I was happy :)

Here are the boys on our hike in Exeter...I think it's called Fisherman's Cove. Dean refused my sturdy back pack carrier, is too big for the baby bjorn, and ended up on my hip. Not my favorite day. I think I'll have to stick to paved paths til we find a carrier that works for Dean. Or I'll have to change my expectation that hiking with (both) kids can be a two mile journey. Drew cried when the hike was over and suggested we leave Dean home and head out again with Wendy, Trent & Elena. Hmmm...not a bad idea.

Family picture

2009-04-14T15:57:00.002-04:00

We had a lovely holiday in CT with Chris' extended family. I am happy we were able to take a family pciture because they seem far and few between. I am so lucky to have all these guys in my life :)

So long...

2009-04-14T15:50:00.002-04:00

...to locks of baby fine blonde hair. Dean had his first haircut and it seems like more than just some strands of hair were left behind. My little baby is growing up :( Although he is handsome with his new-do, he looks OLDER! As the days seem to fall away, much like Dean's fine hair, I am reminded of how fleeting time is. I will do my best to appreciate today...this moment...and live in the present as much as possible. Oh, how sweet it is!

Language Explosion?!?

2009-04-05T20:38:00.003-04:00

Dean is 21 months and has finally achieved his "Language Explosion" (farewell to my worries!). I think he has about 25 words now which he uses freely and unprompted. I'm so proud of my little peanut. He's such an adorable, petite, silly, loving monkey :)

Here are some of his most frequently used words:

Drew (of course!!!)

Mama (second only to Drew!)

Dada

Car (such a BOY!)

Car-car (car carrier)

Ball

Mamoon = Balloon, Moon, or Baboon

Yeah/No (with nod included)

All done! (one of his earliest phrases)

More (while signing please)

Up (usually to get onto the couch)

Down (while signing down - to get off the couch)

Book

Thank you

Dean can also identify about 15 body parts and make several animal sounds. And, this is a big change from 18 months, he loves books and puzzles. Much unlike his big brother, he does not like tv shows at all. It thrills me because I try to limit Drew's tv-viewing and we have many battles over shows. Dean also enjoys assembling tracks - or towing cars & trucks. I think he prefers trains to cars (while Drew prefers cars) and he loves hearing and saying "All Aboard!" His favorite outside activity is mowing the lawn (isn't that wonderful?) or being pulled in a wagon :) He's not yet a huge playground fan...probably because those very tall slides intimidate him. He's begun sitting on the potty regularly, but has yet to pee or poop there - even accidentally. He still loves his sleep, can hang out in his crib for hours - even awake, and adores his blankey. He's much more independent these days - both in and out of the home. He will play by himself for long periods (yippee!) but also loves to play with Drew or a friend. He loves entertainment (puppet shows or music performances) but hates to sit still (he's often running up and down the aisles). He continues to be silly (loves to be chased, hide, and laughs a LOT), loving (asks for Mama, Dada, Drew every time he wakes up), and gentle (shares nicely too!). He is such a love...and growing into such an incredible little boy.

PHOTOS of Spain

2009-04-01T14:43:00.009-04:00

Alas, we are back in the USA!

Here are a few photos from our trip to Spain. To see more pictures, please check out our website. We had a wonderful vacation and I'm really happy I was able to blog about most of our experiences (see posts below). Neither words nor photos can capture the excitement of our experiences...but it will live on in our hearts. VIVE ESPANA!

Adios Espana

2009-04-01T13:31:00.005-04:00

Our last full day in Barcelona, miercoles, was spent walking and walking and walking (like most days). After our cafe con leche and a bite to eat (I had a "bikini"), we went to Castell de Montjuic. It is a huge fortress on a mountain with lots of amazing views of Barcelona. We took the metro to a tram to a beautiful gondola ride to the top.

After heading back down, we went to Poble Espanol, which is an area that represents all the regions of Spain...kind of like a mini-Spain. There are shops, restaurantes, trees, architecture from each region. It was cute!

After singing many songs sounding like "I've got pain on the heels of my feet." we made our way back to Barrio Gotico for some last minute shopping. We enjoyed a delicious dinner in El Born and TWO jugs of sangria before heading back to the apartment to clean & pack. We were sad to say Adios to Espana but also excited to return home and see our boys!

Thanks to MAMA (and Pop and Mama-mama) the boys did very well without us. We were greeted enthusiastically Thursday night by two cuties in pjs...and my mother, who cried as she said goodbye to the boys. Needless to say, they all enjoyed their time together! A little post-vacation blues struck both Chris & I, but we'll try to keep the travel flame burning...

el martes

2009-03-24T18:50:00.003-04:00

As I write this blog, I am full from just eating a delicious coconut gelato (gelateria can be found just outside our apartment)...after having eaten a delicious hamburger (yes, we strayed from the Spanish cuisine)...after polishing off a bottle of the tastiest sangria I've ever had...after sharing some delicious nachos with Chris. Amigo, that dinner at Princesa 23 in el Born was delicioso!! I was drawn to it by the dim red lighting, fabulous interior, and big comfty couches. I remember telling Chris before we left Rhode Island that we'd be eating and drinking our way through Spain...I wasn't kidding!

Today we got a late start (that's been the "vacation" mode lately...love it!) and began with cafe con leche. The coffee here has definitely been one of the highlights! Then we wandered by the sea to Barceloneta. Chris got his first feel of the Mediterreano and we enjoyed some paella and flan. We walked around the port, saw the statue of Colon (Christopher Columbus was sent to discover the soon-to-be Americas by the king & queen of SPAIN!), and did lots of shopping. Actually, it's less shopping and more window-browsing...you know how it is. I did buy a new pair of shoes today :) and Chris got a torro t-shirt. On our way home we stumbled upon the cathedral of Barcelona. It is quite beautiful and I was just as impressed with the garden area inside as I was with the structure of the building! Overall, a rather mellow day in our Spanish voyage, but a welcomed one. Tomorrow is our last day here and I think we may head to the top of Tibidabo and visit a particular area where the local artisans live/work. I can't believe our vacation is near the end....but I must confess to greatly missing my two little peanuts back home!

el lunes

2009-03-24T04:48:00.005-04:00

Barcelona...a cultural hub filled with people from all over the world. Incredible architecture steals your attention ~ fine details on each building, numerous fountains and statues, monumentous works of art. Here the narrow, winding streets meet a modern edge that welcomes all people to explore and enjoy.

Monday was spent walking to La Sagrada Familia. I had been there when I studied in Spain - in 1995! - and was excited to see the amazing new developments. It was incredible. After enjoying all the intricate details of Gaudi, and learning more of his life & style, we went to Restaurant Saint Joan for lunch. (Another wonderful recommendation from chowhound). We walked back to el Barrio Gotico via pg. Gracia and enjoyed the big center plaza where thousands of pigeons gathered. We met up with La Rambla and found our way to the enormous market place. We bought some cheese, chocolate, ham, bread, fruit, and wine. What more could one need? After a little ciesta (when in Spain...) we went out to hear some live jazz. I could not have been more thrilled with our choice of music venue. We went to Jamboree - it was a dark, cavernous bar underground with exposed brick walls and cool blue lighting. It was a random group of musicians (well, random to us) and they kept inviting new people on stage...rotating the performers. There was a pianist, drummer, bass guitar, and two horn players along with the occassional female vocalist. I loved the singers! We found two bar stools and spent hours listening to the music. Actually, many people were sitting on the floor in front of the stage which we found interesting. Everyone was definitely there for the music - not banter or chit chat. That was cool. Around 1am we headed back to our apartment, ate some late night tapas, and went to bed.

I did some laundry today (yeah!) and somehow accidentally threw my cell phone into the washing machine. UGH. Of course, I haven't used it once and can't imagine how it got mixed in with my clothing. Alas, it did. So, I might be emailing out requests for numbers soon. C'est la vie! Que sera sera!

el domingo

2009-03-22T18:21:00.003-04:00

It's hard to keep track of the days when you're on vacation, isn't it?

Well, today we left Madrid...but not until experiencing el Rastro! While we didn't take advantage of the shopping quite as I had hoped, it was fun and I did buy a cute little wallet and an art piece for the coffee table :) And, of course, our shopping was immediately followed by cafe con leche, which we are determined to make at home...delicioso, and some churros con chocolate. We were sad to leave our incredible hotel (which we are sure to mention in every conversation about Madrid!), but I will say, our apt. in Barcelona is not too shabby! Yes, we have un apartamento!

Oops...let me back-track a little. Last night we went out with Belen, Batisto, and Janis. They took us to a typical Andalucian bar where they only serve Jerez wine. Belen is actually from Granada, a bit more south in Andalucia, so she insisted we experience things typical from her region of Spain. (Side note: might I add that her boyfriend of 7 years, Batisto, is from France and her friend Janis is from Venezuela...and they all met/lived in Paris for 10 years!) So, we drank this vino, which was not particularly my favorite, but I am open to new things, and we ate some tuna seco. Dried tuna. As in tuna fish. Weird! It was like a leather strip made of raw tuna. Hmmm. So, a cultural experience, yes. One to be replicated in the near future? Not likely.

They also took us to an amazing little bar with delicious tapas....ah, tapas! These I will be trying to make at home :) Who's coming over for tapas y vino next week???

So...Barcelona. We arrived, by plane, this afternoon and we came to our new home. It's beautiful! (Pictures coming soon!) We are very well located too - just off Las Ramblas, in the Barrio Gotico. After getting settled a bit, we went to Born for some dinner at Restaurante Morelia. Everything was amazing! Our walk home was more like a stroll through narrow, cobble-stone streets with ancient buildings and modern bars/shops throughout. It's a great mix of old and new. We got back "home" and did a video call with the kids! Such fun. Drew was so excited; and even Dean seemed to get it: waving at the camera! So cute. I think in a way it does make me miss them more, but knowing they are with Mama and Pop and Mama-mama helps me relax a bit. They are having fun. This week they've spent time at the playground, walking to the beach, going out for ice cream, visiting the windmill, riding on a tractor, exploring the biomes...yes, they're happy! And we're enjoying this adult time...an opportunity to re-connect as friends, explore the world around us, ignite new interests & passions, and feel young again. I guess we're re-connecting with ourselves too! It's been an amazing vacation. And while I look forward to the days ahead...I can also say I look forward to going home - to our home - too!

el viernes

2009-03-20T20:10:00.004-04:00

Our day began with a mad rush to the Atocha train station in hopes of catching the 11am train to Toledo. Upon arrival we realized the old city was more popular than we realized, and all trains were booked through 2pm. Alas, I wasn't too disappointed as I hoped for another relaxing day in Madrid (sorry Chris!). So we ventured to the Plaza Mayor for some cafe con leche and tapas. We stopped along the way to buy some juguetes for the kids (cars and dinosaurs - what else?!?) and took WAY too many fotos. After our relaxing brunch, we decided to conquer the city by foot! We went to the Palacio Royal and enjoyed local artists, street performers, and shops along the way. Finally, we made our way to the Parque Retiro with some jamon, queso, y pan. It was a beautiful day in the park! The weather has been incredible - trees are budding with new leaves and flowers, children are playing, and everyone is strolling the streets. Spring is here and we are loving it!

Despite the fact that we didn't get our meals right today (some disappointing tortilla espanola...our lunch did not include manchego cheese OR vino...and we didn't have time for paella YET), we had lots of fun exploring the city. Best of all, we LOVED the flamenco show this evening. We went to Casa Patas, which was near our hotel, and enjoyed the music, the dancing, the tapas, and the sangria!

After another quick bite and some local brewed organic beer, we found ourselves back at the hotel around 1am...to be greeted by a note from Belen. She came to meet us at our rooftop bar, but we missed her! Our plan is to meet up tomorrow for dinner around 9pm. (You have to love the Spanish "schedule"!) So, here we are...raging party one floor above, and I'm in here blogging...and ready for bed. Tomorrow is another day. We've had a good amount of sangria y cerveza...necesito dormir porque vamos a explorar (y ir de compras) manana.

Buenas noches!

Madrid - el primer dia en Espana

2009-03-19T18:31:00.004-04:00

Estamos aqui en Espana!! After a long flight, with little sleep for me, we finally arrived in Madrid. In an effort to save a little dinero, we took el metro to the hotel (in lieu of a taxi = 40 Euros!). We are veteran subway folks so we found the metro system very easy to conquer. We arrived at our hotel, ME Madrid, near the Plaza del Sol and we were VERY impressed. I thought it was a nice choice from the website, but words cannot describe the sophicated glamour of this fine hotel. Let me just say George Clooney stayed here. Yes, it's that swanky! Marta, who greeted us at the desk, was delightful and chose a spectacular room for us with a magnificent view. The picture below was taken with Chris' IPhone (which has been so useful for navigating through the city!)...more digital camera pics to follow soon.

We were pretty exhausted and immediately got cozy in our hotel room and took a nap. It was just what we needed to revive ourselves...and we were ready to explore! We walked through the streets (our hotel is in an IDEAL location) and we ended up at the Prado Museum. After a good dose of Goya, El Greco, Valesquez...we went for some cafe con leche at a local coffee house (delicioso!) and headed back to the hotel. Then we took the advice of friends on chowhound and ventured to Cava Bajo for the best tapas in Madrid. We ended up at Taberna Tempranillo where we indulged in local favorites: un plato con jamon y manchego con pan, un plato de pato cocido con cebellas pequenas, y cerveza & vino de Espana. Fantastico! After our delicious meal, we strolled back towards Plaza Mayor - enjoying shops, street vendors, and performers along the way. We took a short break for churros con chocolate (can not miss that!) and got back to the hotel by 1am. I can't believe how exciting our first day has been, how relaxed and happy we are, and how wonderful it feels to be back in Spain.

(Of course, it's easy to enjoy ourselves knowing the kids are in excellent hands! We only hope they don't ask to return to "mama's house" when we return!)

Stay tuned...more to come :)

February Fun!

2009-03-13T15:27:00.009-04:00

We had quite an exciting month! There has been so much happening...and so little time for blogging. Life with TWO boys is BUSY! I wanted to post an update. Here's the latest:

We had several celebrations for Chris' 35th bday! That's how I like to do things...a month of parties! We had a surprise party for Chris at Tazza Cafe after a couple of family gatherings at home. The kids LOVE birthday parties and Drew helped make Daddy's special ice-cream birthday cake!

During February vacation week, Nicole and I took all 4 kids to the Biomes. It's a small, hands-on aquarium with lots of touch tanks, turtles, starfish, mini sharks, snakes, and lots of sea creatures! The boys loved it! What was most surprising to me was how Dean became Mr. Independent! Drew, Diego, and Layla kind of stuck together - but Dean was running off on his own, facinated with all the touchable creatures, and refused to be held! It was a beautiful day and following our biomes visit we hit the playground. Oh, how I can't wait for Spring!

The NK Library had a puppeteer come (FREE!) and we brought the boys. What a way to spend a Friday night, eh? Well, they loved it! Drew was facinated with the puppets and Dean...well, Dean was facinated with running around the library :)

Chris & Dan took Drew & Trent (a boys' night!) to see the monster trucks at the civic center! I'm not sure who liked it more - the dads or the boys - but I think a good time was had by ALL!!

Drew and Alex have been amazing at entertaining themselves for hours in Alex's basement playroom. This has allowed for mama-friends, Kathy & me, to quietly sip tea, cuddle with Kyle, and enjoy adult conversation. Yahoo! And Dean, my superstar, either plays with the big kids or sleeps peacefully upstairs. Good times!

Skinny Bitch

2009-02-28T21:03:00.004-05:00

If you haven't read the best seller Skinny Bitch yet, I highly recommend it. It has changed my life. Honestly! It opened my eyes to the truth about the foods I consume ~ as well as the wild, innapropriate, deceitful government "regulations" which one might assume were implemented to keep us healthy. Not so. Alas, I have not gone vegan...I have not yet sworn off all meat products (however, the chapter on meat did make me ridiculously sick). I HAVE given up splenda (despite the occassional diet soda) and switched to sugar in the raw. I've also begun weaning the family from dairy and introduced healthier alternatives like almond milk, rice milk, and soy products. I also cooked lentils for the first time this week (gotta eat those legumes & beans!). I've been trying to drink less coffee and more herbal tea ~ started that back in January. I love tea...but I also love my coffee. Overall, the changes are small and easy. And everyone in my family is accepting of the change ~ in fact, they're embracing it! Dean never liked dairy; and I successfully gave it up for 6 months while nursing him. I'm confident I can do it again. I will admit I haven't fully subscribed to the change: I'm still eating cheese (will I ever stop??), the boys are still eating yogurt, and all my carbs are not yet good carbs. But change has to start somewhere. So, I've started. As I always say: I'm a work in progress. Stay tuned. I'd love to be a Skinny Bitch one day too...minus the bitch ;)

Yo

2009-02-26T15:35:00.003-05:00

My dear friend Lotus pointed out that it has been a LONG time since I last posted. I'm just not posting as much as I used to...or as much as I'd like. That being said, don't my facebook status update count as mini blog entries? Surely if you are my friend on facebook you've thought to yourself (perhaps more than once), "Wow, Kristen is on facebook a lot!" Hmmm...an observation I've made for myself too. With updates such as "Kristen is so grateful for all the friends who came out last night!" or "Kristen enjoyed a lovely 5 hours with Kathy & Kyle (& Dean) while Alex & Drew played by themselves!!" who needs blogs?!?

Alas, I am here to post. Or to apologize for not posting. Dean is awake babbling in his room...and I'm cooking a new recipe which beckons from the kitchen..so I'm not able to really post (what else is new?!?). I do promise to visit again soon - and share more about Chris 35th bday party - my successful SURPRISE for him - and the kids, my latest baking accomplishments, the new moms groups, and all the other wonderful happenings here in Rhode Island.

Here's a recent photo to hold you over!! xoxo

DEAN!

2009-02-03T15:49:00.003-05:00

It's been a while since my last Dean update; and there's quite a bit to report! First of all, it's no surprise that Dean, the second (ie. neglected, ignored, deprived) child, was a bit late to walk...and now a bit late to talk. Not "late" by any doctor's standards, but late by mine. He didn't start walking on his own til about 15 months, although he cruised along furniture for quite a while. I think it was the chaos of Drew that kept him holding onto the furniture. Drew runs around like a tornado and Dean was surely aware that he'd be knocked down. So, he waited until he was sure he could handle the speedy toddler. It's a well-known fact that "late" walkers are usually "late" talkers so I wasn't surprised when at 18 months Dean didn't have the lengthy list of spoken words that Drew had at that time. (Poor, poor second child!) However, at the old age of 19 months Dean's vocabulary is advancing and I'm proud to give the following report...

Dean's Words: Mama, Mama-mama, Dada, Drew, up, all-done, more (while signing please), tickle-tickle, that (while pointing), cheese (when taking his picture...won't say it for the food which he loves!)

Dean's Signs: hi, bye, blowing kisses, all done, please

Dean's Animal Sounds: cow, dog, horse, elephant, monkey, cat, dinosaurs, lions, owl

Dean's Favorite Songs: Wheels on the Bus, ABC, Twinkle-Twinkle, Laurie's Got a Pig on Her Head, If You're Happy and You Know It, Dina Blow Your Horn, Old MacDonald Had a Farm, Head Shoulders Knees and Toes

Dean's Favorite Activities: playing trucks & cars (and he makes a mean engine sound), trains, sweeping...he's so helpful!, shape sorting, reading books, playing with animals, ambulences, fire engines, police cars (loves to make siren noises too), painting, making music - piano, drum, maracas, climbing, sliding, ball popper, tj bearytales, dancing, any toy that makes music, EATING!

He's really a little toddler now and so much fun! He's relaxed, easy-going, silly, loves to play, hates TV, wants to know more, and loves his family. He definitely lets us know when he's not happy about something, but most of the time he's happy to go with the flow. Most of all, he can usually be found wearing a smile and showing affection. He's a real lover...

Jinx?!?

2009-01-29T20:36:00.002-05:00

I'm afraid of jinxing it for myself....BUT Drew went down for his nap again today with no trouble and slept 2.5 hours. AND tonight he went to bed nicely again!! The only complaint I have is that he was up 3-3:45am again last night (and came into our room three times...ugh!). However, Drew was on the verge of giving up his nap and had been pushing back his sleep til after 9pm...until we tried this Super Nanny approach. Now he's napping 2-3 hours and falling asleep by 8:30pm. Next mission: sleep through the night...or at least not wake up Mommy!

Night Two

2009-01-28T21:34:00.002-05:00

Well, let me begin by saying last night got more complicated than my previous post reflects. Drew woke up at 1:58am and was out of his bed 8 times before 3:30am. A nightmare! So, lack of sleep was strangling me all morning so that I could barely breathe never mind play. UGH.

The good news is I put him down at 1:30pm for a nap and he slept til 4:30!! We all did. Ahhh...peace.

Not only did he do remarkably well at naptime (he never left the bedroom!!) but he was awesome tonight too! He came out 3 times and was asleep within 30 minutes (even after the great nap).

I'm thinking better nights lie ahead! Yippee! Go Super Nanny!

Super Nanny ME!

2009-01-27T20:49:00.003-05:00

Every parent watches the Super Nanny. How can you not? Joe works with some of the most wild, untamed, ill-mannered, loud children and creates harmoneous homes filled with love. Right? Sure...

Well, we needed a bit of the Super Nanny tough love to ease our bedtime battles. SO...super nanny ME to the rescue. Drew has been getting out of his bed (and prior to that his crib) for weeks now...maybe months?!? It's been a nightmare. He just keeps coming out of his room and is found either wandering the halls, creeping down the stairs, playing with chapstick, hiding, or giggling in delight. He's so pleased with himself. And every night we have the same talk...where Drew says: I'm not going to get out of my room tonight. I'm going to stay in my bed. And night after night after night he does not keep to the promise.

What have we tried so far?

We have tried talking nicely, getting angry, making threats (even threatening to take away his lovie Bubby!), following through on threats (bye bye Bubbie), locking his door from the outside (yes, I confess...we've locked him in a few times), and creating a rewards chart (which failed miserably). So tonight, we tried the Super Nanny approach.

We began at 7:28pm with lights out...good night Drew...we love you. Door closed. We nominated ME as the one to take care of business tonight. Drew came out immediately, I followed him to bed & put the covers back on then left the room, closing the door behind me. Repeat. Repeat Again. And again. Repeat 50 more times. In the meantime, Drew began jumping off the bed to run to the door; he slammed the door open to create a loud noise (and snickered!); he stumbled; he bumped his head against the wall when jumping back into bed; he laughed; he groaned; he sang; he winced. And ultimately...he fell asleep. 40 minutes later. Not bad, eh? ARE YOU FOLLOWING THIS?? Super Nanny wasn't lying! It worked!!

I'll let you know how tomorrow goes. Daddy's on duty :)

Busy, Busy!

2009-01-18T20:40:00.005-05:00

I haven't been blogging as much as I'd like ~ especially considering the amount of reflecting I've been doing. But alas, things have been super busy here and blogging just hasn't been top-of-the-list. So, an update is overdue.

Rhode Island New Moms Connection has been doing really well. It's so exciting to have work that I feel so passionately about...and to see it grow. It's amazing. I will admit it is a lot of work to market, build community partnerships, build the website, register women ~ who are surely committed, and travel to various locations to offer the groups. But it's all worth it. We aren't making a lot of money, but then again our mission is to provide affordable and accessible pregnancy and new mom groups to women in Rhode Island. We've remained true to that mission and true to ourselves. I'm proud of the work we're doing - and proud of our new website too! Take a look; I did it ALL BY MYSELF!

The kids. They've been AWESOME. It's so interesting how we have our ups and downs...and when we're up we're really UP! That's where we are hanging out right now and I love it. The boys have been playing so nicely together - chasing each other around the house, playing trucks & cars & trains & animals, singing & dancing, playing hide & seek...it's great. They went out in the snow today (dean's first time sledding!!) and had a blast. The pictures don't reflect their excitement as they suited-up...and they don't show dean's request for "more please" when he came inside. Too cute. I'm really enjoying them.

I often feel like I have it all: a great husband, wonderful kids, fabulous parents, a business I enjoy, great friends...what I've been working on is re-assuring myself that I deserve it. I remain grateful for every one of these blessings in my life. And I try to have faith that good things come to good people. It's my responsibility to just be the best me I can be...and to respect, appreciate, and enjoy these blessings.

Giving Thanks

2009-01-07T19:25:00.004-05:00

I'm really happy to be one of those people who always appreciates what she has instead of wanting for what she doesn't have. Really - that's who I am. And I'm so grateful for a wonderful family...and fabulous friends. Below is my beloved family on X-mas Eve. We celebrated with a magnificent holiday dinner with those closest to us. It was low stress and lots of fun!

And I've been equally blessed with amazing friends. While many of my closest friends live miles away, I am fortunate to have found such an intimate, supportive community of friends here in RI...in just 3 years! I'm always grateful that GOOD people seem to come into my life. New Year's Eve was enjoyed with some of our closest RI friends. Another easy, fun night!

3.25

2008-12-26T16:25:00.003-05:00

The wonderful world of 3.25 - or 3 years and 4 months.

This stage has new feats as well as challenges...and the pros and cons are both curious and frustrating.

INDEPENDENCE
Pro: Drew now wakes in the morning, uses the potty, and returns to his bedroom - without ANY assistance from us. It's a dream come true! When I hear that door creak open at 6:30am I remain silent...fearing that the very sound of my breath will lure him through my bedroom door. When I hear the sound of him peeing in the potty, I exhale. As he returns to his room and closes his door, a gigantic smile expands across my face as I enjoy another 30 minutes of peace.

Con: Drew insists on doing everything FOR himself and BY himself. No assistance, no "watch me do it, Drew, as I model for you" - and if he can do it, great. If he can't, well, a tantrum of frustration will ensue. This is followed by my persistant coaching & support...which eventually turns into my own tantrum of frustration. He does not want to follow my suggestions!

SMARTS
Pro: Drew knows every letter in the alphabet (upper and lower case) as well as the sounds each make. He can tell you the first letter of every word; and share a list of words beginning with each letter. He loves trying to read and spell. He has a few words under his belt (like Drew, Mommy, Daddy). He also finds it incredibly entertaining to rhyme. Every day he takes words and throws out all the rhymes like Dean-Bean-Mean-Clean-Seen-Ween-Lean-Teen...and he giggles throughout! And he sometimes raps too!

And aside from things he knows, it's the things he says that really impress me!
It's fabulous to hear Drew's questions:
"Is it a half moon or a crescent moon tonight?"
"What do you think Santa will bring you, Daddy?"
"How about...if I finished eating we can watch two shows?"
And along with that, he makes interesting comments and observations:
"Mommy, I love your pajamas!"
"Daddy has to go to work so we can have money to buy nice things."
"I want to leave some seeds on the snowman so the chickadees will come just like in Stranger In The Woods!"

Con: Well, let's start by saying his negotiation skills are top notch. So, bribary doesn't work as well as it once did...and the "distraction technique" is completely useless. He remembers everything you say -for better or worse- and reminds you of your promises, repeats your slanderous remarks, and even makes threats! ("Mommy, if you're not good Santa won't bring YOU any presents!") He is also NO fool! He's not gullable (which is surprising since Mommy is). When grandma said she heard Santa's sleigh and secretly rang some bells, he didn't jump up or run to look. He casually walked over and rang bells himself...knowing that SHE must've rang them and it didn't mean much.

I think what I like most about 3.25yrs. are the conversations we have. I love reading books with Drew (almost always encyclopedia style books with lots of cool facts about animals, dinosaurs, outer space, habitats, etc.). I love seeing him engage with others. I love his social, playful personality. I love his love for people and animals.

My biggest frustration is that he often acts like a baby. I understand that this is probably quite bright of him...babies get lots of attention and acting like one certainly gets us to pay attention (albeit in a negative way), but I wish he could ALWAYS be the engaging, fun toddler that I enjoy so much. If he could tone down his competitiveness and turn up his cooperation life would be a bit easier.

I know these days will fly by like those of the past...so it's my responsibility to enjoy him & love him and help him grow. That is all I can do.

Happy Holidays

2008-12-15T17:49:00.003-05:00

From our family to yours...happy holidays!

Time IN!

2008-11-22T22:00:00.003-05:00

Toddlers are cute. They say silly things like "I'm going to turn you into a rocket ship" and "Let's do a family spinnin' hug!" They can rationalize, realize, admit, and comply. They enjoy sweeping the floor, putting laundry away, and dressing themselves. They talk on the phone with grandma, say "cheeeeeese" for camera, walk by your side in the market, and color with care.

Yet toddlers are quite a challenge. They want to be independent: putting the toothpaste on the toothbrush themselves, choosing their own meals, insisting on certain projects or playgrounds. They struggle to express themselves and often resort to screaming, pushing, biting, or running off.

Well, the challenges of toddlerhood have been getting the better of me lately. I hate to admit it, but it's true. I created a routine chart to help the evening flow, set up a list of rules for table manners, and made a stop light to visually show him warnings and reward him for good behavior. And I used time outs. And I raised my voice. And I got frustrated.

The past few days we've started this: Time IN! If Drew is doing something that upsets us (mainly pushing Dean or having a tantrum), we take a time-in together. We usually go to the stairs, find a comfty seat, and talk. If he's too upset, I'll tell him to let me know when he's ready...and he does. I always tell him I love him, end with a hug, and assure him that I'll give him my attention whenever he asks - so he need not continue the negative behavior to engage me.

I have to say there is definitely not one answer to the complicated world of toddlers. But maintaining my "cool" while being more patient and more loving...despite being ridiculously frustrated at times...has brought about a more loving, calm, happy household.

Autumn walk on bike path

2008-11-09T16:43:00.004-05:00

more halloween pictures...

2008-11-02T19:16:00.006-05:00

Halloween, take 2

2008-11-02T19:08:00.002-05:00

For Halloween Drew wanted to be a scary monster. I had NO idea what that meant...how to make him a monster OR scary. So, after weeks of suggesting he dress as a fireman or clown, I decided we'd do our best to create a scary look. He was amazing as I spread white face cream all over his face...he sat still while I loaded black make-up onto his eyes and lips...and amazingly, he didn't touch it all night! Whew. Dean, on the other hand, will continue to wear hand-me-down costumes until he can complain about it. He was an adorable cowboy - and impressively kept his hat on!

We went to the Batla's house for our traditional Halloween parade, trick or treating, and finally...beer & pizza. Definitely a good holiday!

Halloween, take 1

2008-10-25T15:49:00.006-04:00

Today we went to East Greenwich for some trick-or-treating along Main Street. The businesses there all offered candy for the kids in costumes. It was so fun! Diego was McQueen, Layla was a monkey, and Drew was Dr. Kardos :)

Afterwards, we went to see Diego's soccer game. Drew really wanted to PLAY soccer too. Once the game was finished, Diego, Drew, and Owen (friend from Drew's school who is on Diego's team) all played together. They were so cute.

The Country

2008-10-17T21:08:00.003-04:00

We really do live in the country. This farm is in our backyard - literally. Sometimes we hike through the woods to see it. The owner told me she owns 48 acres of land back there. They sell fruits & veggies, flowers, pumpkins...and it operates on the honor system. What's that, you ask? Prices are labeled and you total up the costs and put your money in a tin can. They trust you! They trust me! It's so cool. I've recently become a regular there. Among my latest purchases: squash, tomatoes, scallions, potatos, a pumpkin. I intend to give them all of my veggie business. If you live nearby, check them out. They're on Lafayette.

Dean...

2008-10-16T20:40:00.004-04:00

There are so many reasons why Dean fills my heart with happiness: he is so easy-going, so happy, loves to make others laugh, wears an enormous smile, and was my cuddler for the first 12 months. There's no denying that special bond we have from breast feeding. But I often wonder if part of why I feel so drawn to him is that he kind of looks like me :) And I know I get wrapped up in this looks thing quite often, but being adopted I've never seen a physical resemblance between myself and anyone. So, it's pretty huge. And I do love seeing myself in Dean. Regardless of why...my heart fills with love every time I think of him. Oooo...sweet child o' mine!

And on a side note...Dean walked across the living room today for the first time! GO DEAN!

Columbus Weekend

2008-10-15T20:59:00.007-04:00

We had a wonderful weekend in New York. Our drive took 3-hours (not bad!) and despite the fact that it took us an HOUR to find a parking space, we ended up parked right outside Ingrid & Stephen's apt! We walked right into The Hideaway, and found Cheryl sitting at the bar. Yahoo! Ingrid, Stephen, Brett, Bram, and Caddigan were close behind. After a few drinks and delicious appetizers (including deviled eggs!), we hit the liquor store and went to the roof deck. It was a beautiful night. Erik came up to join us as well, bringing a lady friend, but wisely left before the "rock band" got out of control. Yes, Rock Band and Shut The Box sucked away many hours this weekend.

After our late night (bed at 3am!), we were lazy Saturday morning. However, we managed to pull ourselves together and stroll Canal Street...Soho...and back to Tribeca. Another beautiful Fall day in NYC. Can't beat it. On to a fabulous Italian dinner at Pepolinos, accompanied by Chris & Ruowen, where we indulged in more appetizers, tasty meals, and four fabulous desserts!

Later, at Tribeca Tavern, Dennis, Cheryl, Megan and friends met us for drinks. We really enjoyed seeing old friends...and appreciate everyone coming out to meet us.

I've already begun planning my next trip (in my head at least). I'm thinking...November?!?

Writing 101

2008-10-14T19:09:00.003-04:00

Drew has begun writing letters. No, not the kind you'd send to grandma in Connecticut, but the kind you'd write to spell your name! And I couldn't be more excited or more proud. Last week he was playing with chalk on the side walk and made the following: D, M, W, O, Q and T. I can only assume this is from the wonderful influence of school (although it also probably developmentally appropriate and this random letter-writing may have occurred regardless) ~ making me love pre-school even more. He can't quite spell his name, but he's half-way there.

The steps of reading & writing according to Drew:
1. Recognize all capital letters and most lower case letters
2. Learn how to pronounce every letter
3. Learn words beginning with each letter
4. Recognize letters by sounding out words slowly
5. Begin writing letters

This is preceeding reading of course. I'm curious to track the development...what is leading to reading and writing. It's quite interesting to me! I bet this is pretty typical, but if not, please share your stories with me!

Pre-school genius

2008-10-07T13:18:00.002-04:00

I struggled quite a bit getting used to pre-school. While it's true that DREW was adjusting well, I was not. It's not that I couldn't bare to have three hours apart from him (in fact, that was rather welcomed!), it's that I wanted to be REALLY sure that he was at the right school. As obsessive as I was when searching for a pre-school, I was equally crazed about whether I had chosen well.

I wondered...
Was Drew connecting with other kids? Making friends?
Was he engaging in the activities?
What was he choosing to do during the open play?
Did he participate in circle time?
Was he building relationships with the teachers?
Was he happy???

My concerns were all "normal"...right?

Well, we're about 4 weeks into it and I can tell you this: While he isn't sharing every detail of each day with me (which is hard for me to accept!), he has learned sooooo much.

*Yesterday at nap time I could hear him talking to himself:
"Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday...what day is today? I think it's Tuesday? Yeah, it is. It's Tuesday?" (It was actually Monday, but that's beside the point.)

*Although he already knew all the letters before he entered school, he now knows all the sounds and what words begin with each letter. At breakfast a week ago he said:
"I like apples. Apple. Apple begins with A. Aaaa... Apple."

*And one of the biggest changes is that he is interested in spelling things!! In the bathtub he'll take the bath-letters and put them together and sound them out. Often they don't really make a word, but we switch a few so they do and he'll sound it all out. LIKE READING!! It's pretty amazing.

*Finally, GOOD manners have been learned. The other night he actually brought his dish from the table to the sink. He asks for a paper towel if he spills something. And he is much better about cleaning up, respecting personal space, and putting things where they belong.

GO PRE-SCHOOL!!

Fall Fun

2008-10-07T13:08:00.005-04:00

One cannot deny that autumn in New England ROCKS! Pretty trees and lovely temperatures aside, we've been having so much fun on our family outings. Trips to the zoo...dinners with friends...a visit to Edaville Railroad...and even a potluck dinner at Drew's school. Below are a few of MY favorite pics from the last few weeks.

Register to Vote!!

2008-09-21T10:37:00.001-04:00

Finally, registration made easy. There are no excuses. Complete the registration and make a difference: VOTE!! Your vote really does matter in this election!

Two weeks of Montessori

2008-09-18T20:44:00.003-04:00

It's only been two weeks since Drew started school and I'm already noticing a change. He really seems more patient, more mature...it's wild. Tonight we decorated a haunted cookie house and it was so much fun! Drew placed the little candies with great precision - focused & concentrated. He also has become interested in spelling words and sounding out letters; he insists on getting the toothbrush & toothpaste together; prefers pooping in the bathroom for "privacy;" and knows so many facts about so many things! He continuously impresses me, surprises me, and fills my heart with love.

School Daze

2008-09-09T12:52:00.005-04:00

...I mean School DAYS!

We had the Parent Orientation for Drew's new school, Cornerstone Montessori, last week. I felt anxious walking in. Who would be teaching my son? What would the other families be like? How quickly would Drew acclimate to the new routines? Who would he click with..or struggle with? I listened intently as the "experienced" parents reflected on previous years and shared their hopes for the coming days. At the end, I cried.

Today was Drew's third day at school. He attends M/T/Th/F 8:45 - 11:45am. No big deal, right? So then, why, on day three, am I still wanting to cry?

As we got into the car this morning Drew said: "I want you & Dean to stay at "cool" today." (He often drops that first "s" before a consonant...so cute) I explained how school was for kids and Dean needed to nap. When we got to the school he then said: "Ok, I can go in by myself. You can stay in the car. Bye!" Ummm....what?!? Of course we all walked in together, although there was no holding hands. Both of those scenarios made me sad: Drew wishing I could stay and hoping I would leave.

The pick-up is really exciting. I am greeted with a BIG hug and smile. He doesn't share too much of his day...that's disappointing...but an occassional bit will slip out randomly. For example, at lunch yesterday he began singing: "Hello. How do you do? Nice to be with...MOMMY!" Clearly a song from circle time.

I'm eager for him to make new best friends and enter his class enthusiastically. I hopeful that he'll share more of his day with me and tell me cute stories. I'm excited for him to learn something new...or bring home little projects...or even ask to go back to school.

I know he's safe; I know he'll do well. But this transition is a lot harder than I expected it would be...FOR ME!

drew & dean

2008-08-22T21:18:00.006-04:00

Drew

*****

friendly
organized

concentrated

active

social

outgoing

paranoid

neat

thoughtful

sharing

sensitive

reflective

generous

funny

in-charge

Dean

*****

silly

cuddly

independent

humorous

musical

easy-going

happy

chill

laid-back

artistic

busy

helpful

curious

climber

thrill-seeker

Celebrate Good Times...

2008-08-15T20:36:00.004-04:00

We've had a lot of birthday cake recently :) Dean turned 1 in June; Drew turned 3 Monday. We've enjoyed lots of parties with friends and family... and lots of new toys, book, & puzzles! I am always amazed, when I look back, at how quickly it all went by. I continue to try to freeze time...unfortunately, witout much success. Some day, my friends. Some day. But for now, we'll just have to keep on celebrating!

Nantucket

2008-08-09T20:01:00.006-04:00

We had the great joy of spending 4 nights in Nantucket with Chris, Madzia, and Summer...in Madzia's Dad's beautiful home. What a BLAST! Here are some pics...

Thank you for such a fabulous vacation! The kids enjoyed their first ferry ride, first live puppet show, first visit to an island, and first vacation with Chris, Madaket, and Summer! xoxo

Happenings

2008-07-28T19:34:00.003-04:00

We've been having quite the busy summer so I haven't had much time for blogging. I'm going to try to make up for lost time.

BIG NEWS or HAPPENINGS...

Drew - He's finally going number 2 on the loo. Yahoo!
One morning I woke up and decided I would not succumb to putting a diaper on my nearly-3-year-old Drew so he could go poo-poo. I'd had enough! And I must say... it is soooo much easier to wipe a butt that has not been mulling in feces. Blah!

Dean - It's tragic. It's heartbreaking. It's difficult to accept... Dean took it upon himself to wean this month. I struggled for a few weeks - trying to nearly force my breasts upon him, but I accepted defeat (while shedding a few tears) and have moved on. I desperately miss our quiet, cuddly time and now seize any opportunity to hold him. Why does time have to pass so quickly...and why must infants grow?

Mommy - After two exciting years of facilitating new moms groups, a friend and I have started Rhode Island New Moms Connection. We offer affordable, accessible support groups for pregnant women & new moms in RI. We've spent the past few weeks building partnerships with other professionals in the prenatal/post partum community. It's so exciting! I love talking about women's options, support, motherhood, etc.

Daddy - Well, Daddy has been a little under the weather the past two weeks, but lots of family time has kept him smiling. (Right Daddy?!?) In addition to looking slim (yes, my joining weight watchers has helped everyone), he is golden brown.

Sibling Relations - When Drew is not stealing cars out of Dean's hands or crashing into him with trucks, he is smothering him with hugs and teaching him words/signs/how to be quiet. Dean is ALWAYS enamored, awe-struck, and entertained by Drew...so much so that he'll follow Drew to time-out and continue to play (even though Drew is usually in time-out for having done something to Dean!). It's brotherly love.

Final Notes - Dean turned ONE and weighed in at 20 pounds (skinny minny!) despite eating everything put in front of him. Drew has become an awesome climber and I'd like to see him on a real rock wall - soon! Both boys are complete beach fanatics - even getting thrown around by rough waters doesn't stop them from frolicking in the ocean. I have actually enjoyed the beach days...dare I say, finding it almost relaxing.
(*An entertained Drew is a happy Drew. A happy Drew makes for a happy family!)

Potty Training (# 2)

2008-07-11T17:36:00.002-04:00

Yippee! Drew is finally pooping in the potty!! He has been nearly potty-trained for a couple of months now and it's been great! I never have to ask him to go...or remind him - he tells me when he has to go pee-pee; and he honestly doesn't have accidents. It's been easy. EXCEPT, he has refused to poop in the potty. So, once a day he asks for a diaper, I put it on him, he poops, and I change him. I finally felt tired of that routine and decided yesterday there would be no more diapers! He has since pooped in the potty THREE times! And although he is still (so far) asking for diapers before pooping, I feel confident that diapers are a thing of the past. Whew! GO DREW!

7 Days of No Show!

2008-06-28T20:50:00.003-04:00

For one entire week the television has been OFF, for Drew that is. He hasn't watched Sunny Patch or Sesame Street or a show on constuction vehicles, trains, or even animals. No show. Nada. We do this once in a while because he gets show-crazy, claiming that he NEEDS to watch something. Needs? Well, I need the down-time, but this week I sacrificed the calm 30 minutes that the tv brings. So instead of seeing the zoned out Drew (see top photo), I saw fun projects, play-dough dinosaurs, beautiful paintings, chalk on the sidewalk, tall block building, car races....everything that entertains when tv is not an option. I did suffer some tearfull moments, but they eventually passed. Here's the result of this weeks NO SHOW:

Hiking at the Audobon

2008-06-19T14:21:00.009-04:00

Wendy and I took the boys for a mid-day hike today. It was incredibly gorgeous - the weather, the trails, the scenery. The boys had so much fun discovering along the way. We found a baby bird egg shell, beautiful butterflies, a hopping frog, and a snake! We ate lunch by the waterfall & pond - and the boys enjoyed throwing sticks and rocks into the water. Great day!!

Summer time FUN!

2008-06-15T10:04:00.006-04:00

This past week was awesome - unbelieveably HOT - but awesome. We went to the beach a couple of times (Bonnet and NK), enjoyed some playdates, went to the zoo (loved the flutterby exhibit), went swimming at the Sterners, and enjoyed a BBQ party.

New Hampshire vacation...

2008-06-08T21:21:00.017-04:00

We took our second family vacation EVER and this time we traveled with friends!! We went to New Hampshire and visited Storyland. Not only was New Hampshire (Glen, NH to be specific) beautiful, the amusement park was perfect for toddlers! It was so great hanging out with our good friends too. Once we put the little ones to bed, we enjoyed kid-free conversations, adult beverages, and games. (What more could one want?!?)

Drew's favorite thing about Storyland was the Bamboo ride - he's still talking about it! Despite the 4-hour-ride-back-from-NH-headache, everything was perfect!

One final look at the beauty which inspired us all weekend!

Fun

2008-06-02T16:23:00.007-04:00

Saturday we went for a walk on the bike path...and watched the trains (of course!). Drew LOVES trains! And we all love walking together.

Family time ROCKS.

And today we met friends Heidi, Hannah, and Abby for a hike...and picnic lunch on the beach. It's days like these that I loooooove being in Rhode Island. It is so beautiful this time of year and there is so much to explore!

Memorial Pics...

2008-05-27T11:36:00.013-04:00

A few of my favorite pictures from this weekend...

Left: Lisa & Ann
Two cute bellies!

Right: Brian
At the grill?!?

Left: Lotus
Way too cute in her skort

Right: Ruowen
Walking through the screen

Left: Steve & Ingrid
Too cute!

Right: Alan & Chris
Brotherly love

Memorial Weekend ROCKS!

2008-05-27T11:20:00.005-04:00

So we hosted another Memorial Weekend party...an annual event for the Kardos clan. It is such fun to have all of our friends together - and a sweet bonus that the kids slept at mama's house. Our friends, both old and new, joined us in celebrating and we had a blast.

Thank you sunshine for cooperating.

Thank you Mom for taking the boys.

Thank you BC friends for traveling from Boston, NYC, and LA to join us.

Thank you babes & toddlers for cooperating.

Thank you friends for all the goodies you brought.

Thank you Chris for being the grill master.

Thank you Todd for fixing my clogged drain and starting the fire.

Thank you friends for all the laughs.

Good times.

Potty Training (# 1)

2008-05-14T15:14:00.002-04:00

That's right...big boy underwear! Drew has been wearing undies for five days now. FIVE days. I am still putting on diapers when he goes to sleep, but otherwise, he's a potty man. The first day I put him on the potty every hour = success. The second day we had one accident. And today, day five, he's actually asking me to take him to the potty. "I have to go pee pee, Mommy." Such progress! Now we still have one BIG hurdle: Number 2.

When it comes to "number 2" Drew would rather dance around the living room in suffering than let it go on the potty. I've tried everything: reading with him on the potty, bringing his potty into the bathroom and sitting alongside him, putting the potty in front of the tv, offering endless rewards, giving him privacy... Alas, he refuses. (Or rather he is scared to death!) So, he does # 2 at night or naptime when he's got his diaper on.

I refuse to let that be a shadow over this exciting time : Drew is peeing in the potty! All day every day! Hip hip horray!

Children's Museum

2008-05-09T15:01:00.005-04:00

In recent conversations with friends, I've realized a few things:

1. In order to have a trust-worthy child, you have to trust your child.

2. If you are a confident parent, you can handle it - whatever "it" may be.

3. Shit is going to happen whether you are right next to your child or steps away. That's because shit happens. It's life. What matters is how you manage it. (Refer to #2!)

Ok, with that behind me...

The kids and I met Kathy & Alex at the Children's Museum today. We had such a blast. Here are some fun pictures!!

Dean update

2008-05-09T14:42:00.002-04:00

My baby Dean is no longer...

no longer a baby.

I remember Drew's first year:

I couldn't wait for the next milestone.

When will he crawl? Pull up? Walk? Talk?

I was so eager and encouraging of this development.

The second time around is so different.

Each milestone Dean reaches I proclaim, "He's already..." and I sigh. Where is my baby? Dean has been crawling for quite some time. Now I will add that he can pull up to his knees & standing position (while holding on to anything!) and he's even taking a step or two! He can use the snack trap with ease...loves his born free sippy cups...and is even using the spoon (if I am in the mood for a mess). He's signing "more" and waving hello/goodbye. He's self-entertained (or Drew-entertained); he's still a great sleeper (day or night); and he laughs often. He's an easy-going guy, very affectionate with those he knows and loves.

Dean brings much joy to this family...and he's growing so quickly!

Touch a Truck Event (# 5)

2008-05-05T13:34:00.003-04:00

Touch-a-truck events never get old for Drew. He LOVES them. It is so much fun to see him having so much fun. Here are a few pics from Saturday's event in Wakefield.